


Deal with a Demon

by Shipsorsanity



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Dipper has anxiety, Dipper is depressed, F/F, Ford makes a deal with Bill, Ford tricks Bill, Human Bill Cipher, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts, bisexual dipper, pansexual Mabel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-29
Updated: 2017-09-01
Packaged: 2018-05-29 22:01:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 19,936
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6395560
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shipsorsanity/pseuds/Shipsorsanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stanford Pines wasn't afraid of many things.</p><p>Monsters weren't scary, he knew that any monster he faced wouldn't be the death of him. Heights were just a new perspective. Spiders were an evolutionary feat. The dark was nothing more than absence of light.</p><p>The one thing Stanford Pines was afraid of was losing his family.</p><p>And he'd do whatever it takes to keep them safe.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Fear

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fic, so please give me feedback if you like it or see something that needs improving.

Stanford Pines wasn't afraid of many things.

Monsters weren't scary, he knew that any monster he faced wouldn't be the death of him. Heights were just a new perspective. Spiders were an evolutionary feat. The dark was nothing more than absence of light.

The one thing Stanford Pines was afraid of was losing his family.

\---

The third summer after Bill's defeat, Ford was scared.

He and Stan were taking a break from their adventures for the summer to visit Gravity Falls, like they'd done for the past couple years. Dipper and Mabel convinced their parents to let them stay with them for the entire summer.

Ford learned that Mabel had transitioned perfectly to the high school life. Her grades weren't perfect, but they were still good-especially for being in so many clubs. Throughout the summer, she perfectly managed her time between school friends, Gravity Falls friends, Mystery Shack shifts, and family.

Dipper on the other hand…his high school experience was anything but perfect, except for his grades. Dipper took the hardest AP classes he was able to and because he spent all of his time studying, he didn't make any friends.

Since he knew that Dipper would lie and say he was fine, Ford waited until Stan was keeping Dipper busy with a new attraction until he asked Mabel about how Dipper was doing during the school year. Immediately Mabel's mood shifted an she told Ford everything she had been worrying about for the last year.

"He stays in his room all of the time. He rarely talks to me anymore, and some days he doesn't even acknowledge me." Mabel sniffed. "He doesn't have any friends. Some people pretend to be his friend but I hear them talking bad about him. Sometimes I see him carrying all his books home for no reason."

Before confronting Mabel, Ford had been worried. Now, he was terrified.

\---

Ford spent half of his summer building and the other half with his family. Nobody knew what he was working on. He wouldn't let anyone near it.

Stan "found" a notebook Ford was writing in and tried to figure out what he was doing, but he lost interest after reading several large scientific words.

Mabel didn't understand and Dipper just didn't seem to care.

When Mabel told Ford that Dipper didn't care what he was working on, he spent twice as much time building.

\---

When Ford had finally finished the machine, the young Pines twins had been gone for two days. He and Stan planned to set sail five days after. 

Ford began the summoning ritual.

Immediately after he mumbled the last words, laughter filled the room. The laughter used to make him break, but now he stood tall.

"Bill!" Ford yelled, "I've decided to make a deal!"

The laughter stopped immediately and a golden triangle appeared before Ford's eyes.

"Heya Sixer, I was wondering when you'd come around. What can I get for ya? Power? Fame? A galaxy?"

Ford didn't blink. He said "I want you to watch Dipper. Make sure he's safe. Keep him out of harm's way."

Bill rolled his eye. "Boring! What's in it for me? It would be a lot more entertaining to just let him go out of his mind!"

Ford said "I knew you'd want something. That's why I made this." Ford gestured to the machine. "This machine will give you a physical form. To my knowledge, it's irreversible, and it can only be operated by me."

Bill seemed interested. Then he was suspicious. "Why would you give me a physical form? You know it would mean the end of your universe, eventually."

Ford said "I care about my family. Dipper's not taking high school well and I'm worried he might…do something."

Bill rolled his eye again. "Alright, fine. You're sure this machine will give me a physical form?" Ford nodded. "Well, that's enough for me! Let's shake on it!" Bill's hand was engulfed by blue fire and Ford shook it.

Immediately after, Ford put in the last codes for the machine and told Bill to get inside of it. Bill, laughing as he did so, said "Ya know Sixer? I used to think you were smart! Now I know you're just stupid!"

Ford flipped a switch and Bill laughed as the transformation began. "You really don't know anything, do you! Once I get my physical form I'll be unstoppable!"

"That's where you're wrong." Ford said, confusing Bill for once. "I never said what kind of physical form. There are a surplus of ideas, after all."

Bill realized he had been tricked. He screamed and tried breaking out of the machine, but it had been lined with unicorn hair.

"I could have picked a squirrel, or a bee," Ford continued, "But those wouldn't protect my grand-nephew."

Bill screamed one final time as the transformation completed.

Ford opened the machine and Bill tried to fly out–but he couldn't fly. He looked down at himself and saw a human body.

"What have you done?" Screamed Bill. Ford smiled.

"I have made you a powerless, mortal, and human physical form. Still within the lines of our agreement."

Bill screamed and sobbed. Ford waited until he was done. He knew that Bill would have to get used to his human body, and the new level of emotions that came with it.

When Bill finished, he whispered "Couldn't you have had the decency to give me a fully grown body?"

Ford took a closer look at Bill. He didn't mean to give him the body of a teenager. He had assumed that his machine would give Bill an adult body.

Ford, when he realized this, immediately began preparing a way for Bill to inconspicuously keep his end of the deal.

Ford told Bill everything he could think of about taking care of his human body. He also recommended keeping a journal to remind him to eat, sleep, and whatever else he might forget.

When Bill was ready, Ford sent him to Piedmont. "And remember," Ford said as Bill was leaving, "make sure my family is safe."


	2. Dipper's New Classmate

It's been seven days since school started and Dipper's already ready for it to be over.

At this point, he isn't angry at how quickly school throws him into depression. He's impressed. _Seven days in. This beats last year's record of ten._

If it wasn't for Mabel forcing him out of bed every morning, he would have given up on school years ago. He reminded himself to thank his sister later, when he was feeling less horrible about everything.

By the time Dipper made it to the kitchen, Mabel was already ready to go. Dipper, instead of making Mabel wait for him to eat, grabbed a granola bar for breakfast and followed her out the door.

The walk to their high school was short, but peaceful. Ten minutes where he could pretend he wasn't depressed. It was Dipper's favorite part of the day. And one of the only times he could talk with Mabel alone.

Sometimes Dipper hated the fact that Mabel was so social. _Her friends keep her away from me_ , he found himself thinking, and he immediately felt bad. _It's not Mabel's fault she has friends. It's my fault for not having any._

"Watcha thinking about bro?" Mabel asked, forcing Dipper back to reality.

Dipper didn't want to make Mabel feel down, so he stuck with his usual answer: "Nothing."

Mabel, as usual, didn't buy it. But Dipper knew she wouldn't push him to tell her anything he didn't want to. For that, Dipper was thankful, so he found a subject to change the topic to.

"Feeling nostalgic?" Dipper asked, gesturing at the sweater Mabel was wearing. It was her old Shooting Star sweater. He was surprised it was in such good condition after all these years.

"You're one to talk." Mabel retorted as she snatched Dipper's pine tree hat. Laughing, Dipper tried and failed to grab it out of Mabel's hands. Soon, Mabel started running and Dipper had no choice but to chase her down.

Mabel stopped running a soon as she got on school grounds and Dipper soon saw why.

Mabel's friends were waving her over to them and she was stuck choosing between him and them.

Dipper knew that she didn't want to leave him alone, but he also knew that he'd be pretty boring and she'd have more fun with them.

Before Dipper could tell her to go, she put his hat back on his head and said "See ya later bro." Mabel slowly walked to her large group of friends.

Dipper, not having anywhere else to go, went to find a small corner of the library to try to not cry in before school started.

\---

Dipper seriously regretted his choice to take all advanced classes this year.

The class work was rigorous, the amount of homework was insane, and if that wasn't enough, he was a perfectionist.

It's not like Dipper's parents were strict. They were the opposite. They didn't care what grade he got, what classes he took, or what he did after school, as long as he graduated.

While Dipper was taking home hours of homework a night and spending twice as long as typical to make sure he would get an A, Mabel was doing no more than an hour of homework every night after her after school clubs and got mostly B's.

Dipper was jealous of Mabel. It didn't take long for him to feel bad and scold himself. And when he scolded himself, almost nothing could snap him out of it.

While stuck in his self-deprecating thoughts, he didn't notice the announcement his chemistry teacher made, or the new student that sat next to him, until he felt something hit his arm.

Dipper thought that someone had thrown something at him and was ready to fight back when he turned and saw the new student holding a pencil. Amused, the new student said "So…" he looked up to Dipper's hat "…Pine Tree…"

Dipper wanted to crawl in a ball and hide. _I knew I'd be made fun of if I wore my hat._

The student continued. "Guess you weren't paying attention. Anyway, you look like the kind of guy who likes to write down everything the teacher says. And the teacher's saying stuff."

Dipper's eyes widened in shock and he asked "How long has he been talking?"

The student laughed. "Hey, take it easy, Pine Tree. Like, ten seconds."

"Don't call me Pine Tree," Dipper told him, "I go by Dipper."

"Mm, nah, still going to call you Pine Tree." he said decisively. Dipper rolled his eyes and tried to pay attention to his teacher's lecture.

\---

Dipper tried to take notes. He really did. But for once, he couldn't focus on what his teacher was saying.

Dipper tried to tell himself it was just because the new student was distracting him by attempting to balance pencils on his head.

Definitely not because he was attractive.

The new student's messy blond hair, well structured face, and electric blue eyes were absolutely not what was distracting him.

Dipper was thankful when class ended. He made a note to look up what he was supposed to have learned and rushed out of the classroom. He hoped that the new student wasn't in any more of his classes. He didn't have the time to make up all of them at home.

\---

As Dipper packed his backpack he realized that for once, luck was on his side. His teachers didn't give out much homework that night, so he was able to leave most of his books in his locker. Plus, the new student wasn't in any of his other classes, so he wouldn't be distracted during the rest of the year.

 _I'll schedule extra time for science homewor_ k. Dipper thought. _Until I can get used to him, I'll need to look up what I missed in class._

Dipper thought back to his science class that day.

No doubt, the student was obnoxious. He was the kind of guy who thought that everything he did was hilarious. Dipper couldn't stand those guys.

But there was something about him that Dipper couldn't resist.

"Hey Dipper, what happened?" Mabel asked as she walked to him.

"What do you mean?" Dipper asked. How had she known…?

Mabel, bouncing with excitement, said "You're smiling. And after school too! Something really good must have happened."

Dipper laughed nervously and said "Yeah, I just don't have a lot of homework tonight." _It's not a complete lie._

Mabel smiled brighter and said "Perfect! I was talking to someone today and he's just your type! I can introduce you two tonight. It'll be fun!"

Dipper sighed. _Playing matchmaker again. And right after I found someone by myself too._

Mabel, ignoring Dipper's sigh, said "Pacifica's family is flying down here tonight. She can come with us. It'll be a double date! …Where should we go? Bowling? Bowling's fun. Maybe to dinner? I don't know…"

Mabel rambled on for a good thirty seconds before Dipper's mind caught up to what she said.

"What do you mean 'double date'?" He asked. "Doesn't that imply that you and Pacifica are together?"

Mabel stopped rambling and turned serious. She said "We are together. We've been dating since mid-summer. I thought you knew."

Dipper immediately felt awful. Most of his summer was spent reading in an attempt to distract himself from his own thoughts. _Did I really not notice Mabel had a girlfriend? Or did I just forget?_

Dipper laughed anxiously. "Sorry Mabel, guess I forgot."

Dipper noticed her worried expression.

"Anyway, who is this guy who's supposedly my type?" Dipper asked, changing the subject.

Mabel, happy to continue playing matchmaker, said "Oh, he's new, so you probably haven't met him. But trust me on this. You two would either kill each other or kiss each other. Let's focus on the latter. Oh, there he is now!"

Mabel waved to someone behind him. Dipper turned around and saw the new student from his science class walking towards them, returning Mabel's wave. Rolling his eyes, he thought _Of course. It just has to be him._

Dipper turned back to his locker and pretended to decide what books he needed to take home. Truthfully, he was all packed, but he needed an excuse to ignore his classmate.

That is, until he heard him say "So Shooting Star, what's Pine Tree ignoring me for?"

 _Shooting Star…?_ Dipper wondered. _And he calls me Pine Tree…_

_No…_

"Yeah Dipper, Bill's new. Don't be rude." Mabel chimed in.

"B-Bill?" Dipper exclaimed as he fell against the lockers. _No no no why is he here I thought he was gone…_

"Dipper are you okay?" Mabel asked. "Your breathing's being weird again.

Dipper used what little strength he had to stand and pull Mabel behind him, yelling "Get away from her!" If he's back, I'm not going to let him take Mabel away again.

"Dipper, what's going on?" Mabel asked. Dipper turned and saw her face. It showed confusion and concern for Dipper.

Dipper looked Mabel in the eyes and said "Who else calls us Shooting Star and Pine Tree."

Mabel gasped and looked back at Bill. "You're triangle Bill?" Mabel asked him.

Bill nodded and said "I thought you guys knew. Oh well. Like my new physical form? Someone gave it to me willingly."

Dipper put on his backpack, grabbed his sister's hand, and ran all the way home. He didn't stop until he got to his room.

Dipper's breathing worsened and he felt himself shaking uncontrollably. Soon his face was wet. He forced himself to go to sleep. _Maybe I can convince myself it's all a dream,_ Dipper thought as his last conscious thoughts left him.

He couldn't.

\---

Journal entry 1

WENT TO SCHOOL TODAY. THAT WAS BORING. NOW I GET WHY HUMANS AVOID IT AT ANY COST.

I SHARE A CLASS WITH PINE TREE. THAT WILL MAKE MY JOB A LOT EASIER. HE DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS ME AT FIRST! HA! IT WAS HILARIOUS WATCHING CONFUSION TURN TO TERROR.

SHOOTING STAR LIKED ME. SHE'S IN MORE OF MY CLASSES THAN PINE TREE. SHE GAVE ME A SEAT AT HER TABLE, BUT THE OFFER WILL MOST LIKELY BE GONE SINCE HER BROTHER FREAKED OUT WHEN HE SAW ME.

GUESS I'LL HAVE TO SIT WITH OTHERS AT LUNCH.

SPEAKING OF WHICH, EATING IS BORING. THIS NEW PHYSICAL FORM REQUIRES SO MUCH FOOD I'M IN PAIN MOST OF THE TIME. I THINK IT MAY BE "HUNGER."

EMBARRASSMENT IS NEW. I MEVER UNDERSTOOD WHY IT WASN'T "ACCEPTABLE" TO YELL EVERYTHING BUT NOW I KNOW IT'S BECAUSE OF EMBARRASSMENT.

FEELING TIRED IS ALSO NEW. I'M USED TO BEING AWAKE FOR ALL ETERNITY BUT NOW IT SEEMS LIKE I'LL FALL ASLEEP ANY SECOND.

STILL NOT SURE WHAT I HAVE TO PROTECT PINE TREE FROM. I'LL FIGURE OUT HOW TO SAVE PINE TREE FROM WHATEVER DANGER HE'S IN LATER. AFTER I GET SOME SLEEP.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The amount of love the last chapter got still shocks me. Thanks everyone! I hope I didn't disappoint you with this!


	3. Bill Almost Breaks His Promise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Dipper has some pretty intense thoughts in this chapter.

Dipper woke up covered in sweat and breathing heavily. _It's just a nightmare. There's no giant triangle demon about to kill me or my sister. I'm on my bed in California. Not in Oregon._

Dipper calmed his breathing over the course of ten minutes. Then he glanced at the clock, expecting to see 3:00 AM displayed. Instead he saw 7:00 PM.

 _Must have fallen asleep doing homework_ , he thought. Then he looked around his room and saw his backpack sitting unopened in the middle of the floor.

Then he remembered.

_Bill's back. I ran home…did he follow me? Did he get Mabel already? Mabel…how could I have just fallen asleep? It's all my fault if he's done something to her…_

Before Dipper could do anything, he heard a gentle knock on the door. "Dipper? Are you awake yet?" Mabel called from the other side.

 _She's safe._ Dipper sighed in relief. "Yeah, I'm awake. Are you okay?"

Mabel opened the door. "What do you mean am I okay? I heard screaming. Your face is red. Have you been crying? Did you have another nightmare?"

Dipper didn't want Mabel to worry about him so he said "No, I just hit my funny bone. And my heel." Mabel winced. _She believes me._

Mabel gave Dipper a bowl of cereal and said "Anyway bro I brought you something to eat. We need to talk about today." Dipper nodded and took the bowl from her hands.

"What do you think he's here for?" Mabel asked.

Dipper thought for a moment before saying "Revenge, probably."

"Why revenge?" Mabel asked.

Dipper looked up at her and said "We killed him. Or at least, we tried to. He probably wants to get us back." Mabel nodded.

"Didn't he say something about having a physical form?" Mabel asked. Dipper was shocked he didn't think of that himself.

"It makes sense. He might be using someone's body to get one for himself" Dipper said.

Mabel, after thinking for a minute, said "What if he just wants to be friends with us?"

Dipper almost fell out of his chair. "What? You're-you're kidding, right?" Mabel shook her head. "This is-this is Bill we're talking about. You know, the one who wanted to release chaos and death throughout the universe."

Mabel shrugged. "I'm just saying it's an option. And wouldn't he have done something to us by now?"

Dipper shook his head. "He's smarter than that. He probably wanted to get our trust before betraying us. He almost had it, too."

_Bill was so close to tricking us. That's terrifying. He made friends with Mabel and if I didn't catch him…I'm going to ignore what could have happened._

"Who could have done this?" Mabel asked. Seeing the look of confusion on Dipper's face, she added "Bill mentioned that someone gave him his body to him willingly."

Dipper shrugged. "I don't know. The only people who know about him is us. And the entirety of Gravity Falls, but they don't know how to summon him."

"Gideon does," Mabel pointed out.

Dipper said "He probably forgot by now. Besides, he's just a regular teen now. He doesn't deal with magic anymore."

"That leaves us and Ford," Mabel pointed out.

Dipper shook his head. "Neither of us did it, and Ford already knows the consequences of summoning Bill. He wouldn't make that mistake twice. No, someone probably came across the cave paintings and accidentally summoned Bill, who took advantage of their innocence."

"But Bill said he got his body willingly." Mabel pointed out.

Dipper sighed. _Mabel's too trusting_. "Mabel, Bill made a deal with someone. If you asked him, he'd probably say the same thing about me when you made that sock puppet play. He thinks making a deal is consent to every loophole."

Mabel looked at the floor. "I guess we should try to get the poor guy's body back," she said.

Dipper nodded and said "Yeah. I'll do some research about this, maybe attempt to contact Ford…" Dipper continued rambling as he set up his work station.

Mabel said "Well, I've got to go meet Pacifica. See ya later bro." Before Dipper could say goodbye, she was gone.

Dipper turned back to his desk. He laid out all three of Ford's journals, which were given to him for his last birthday, as well as a notebook from the summer where Ford took him through the cave system under Gravity Falls. He read each book, cross-referencing them with each other, looking for a way to either contact Bill's vessel's owner or stop him from causing any damage.

\---

Dipper didn't notice any time pass as he searched through the books. He would get an idea, write it down, find something to disprove his idea, and cross the idea out. After crossing out more than five full sheets of paper–he stopped counting at that point–Dipper heard his door open.

_Please don't be Mom and Dad. I couldn't begin to explain this._

Luckily for Dipper, it was Mabel. But hen he saw the look on her face, he wished it were his parents.

"Dipper! What are you doing up so late?" Mabel asked. She looked slightly worried, but mostly mad. "Don't you know what time it is?" Dipper shook his head. Then Mabel put one hand on her hip and pointed to a clock.

Dipper gasped when he saw the time. _One-thirty? There's no way I could have been working this long._ He looked at Mabel and laughed weakly. "I guess I lost track of time. I'll go to sleep now." Dipper said.

Mabel seemed content with his answer and said "Alrighty then. Goodnight bro." Dipper smiled until Mabel left the room. Then he broke down.

_I've been working for hours and found nothing. Hours of time wasted and…oh no…I haven't even touched my homework! There's no way I can do it all. Stupid homework…stupid Dipper always losing track of time…Ugh! I can't take it!_

Dipper was on the floor curled in a ball and silently crying. _I can't do this. I can't take it anymore…_

Then, there was a small thought at the back of his head. _Hey_ , it said, _you know, there's a simple way to end your problems. You're on the second floor, it'll be easy._

Dipper recognized these thoughts but couldn't shove them out of his head. _Listen to me,_ they said, _just do one simple thing and you won't have to deal with anything ever again. Take your pick. The window. The scissors. The rope. Look up, look for something that will end all of your problems._

Tears were rolling down Dipper's face. He tried not to listen to those thoughts. He really did, but they were too convincing. They promised an end to his suffering. _No more pain, no more stress, no more expectations…_

Dipper was close to ending his life. He cried harder, as if he were already mourning himself. _I can't believe myself. Am I really going through with this?_

Dipper slowly stood up, silent sobs shaking his body as he opened a drawer he hasn't touched for months. He took out the only piece of paper in there and read it to himself.

_I, Dipper Pines, have chosen to end my life. I leave my research notebooks to my great uncles and the rest of my belongings to my sister…_

_Sister._

Dipper stopped.

_Mabel._

_How could I leave her when Bill's still out to get us?_ Dipper put the piece of paper back into his drawer. _I can't die when Mabel could still be in danger._

Dipper closed the drawer. Tears were still falling from his eyes, but he wasn't going to end his life just yet.

He knew he needed a distraction to prevent his thoughts from returning. His backpack caught his eye. _Well, I might as well do something useful._

Dipper started doing his homework, knowing that he wouldn't get any sleep that night.

\---

Journal entry 2

THAT WAS STRANGE. I JUST WOKE UP FROM A NIGHTMARE. I DIDN'T THINK I COULD HAVE THOSE.

MOST HUMANS HAVE TROUBLE INTERPRETING DREAMS, BUT MINE WAS PRETTY STRAIGHTFORWARD. BASICALLY, I ALMOST FAILED AT MY END OF SIXER'S DEAL.

WHEN SOMEONE MAKES A DEAL WITH ME, BOTH PARTIES ARE WARNED WHEN THEY ALMOST FAIL AND THEY KNOW WHEN THEY DO FAIL. I'M SURPRISED THAT IT STILL HAPPENS WHEN I'M A HUMAN.

I'M NOT SURE WHAT I COULD HAVE DONE TO PREVENT IT. I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW PINE TREE COULD COME SO CLOSE TO DEATH IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. I THINK I'LL ASK HIM OR SHOOTING STAR TOMORROW. AFTER I SLEEP SOME MORE.

IT TURNS OUT PINE TREE WILL NEED MY HELP AFTER ALL.

 


	4. Dipper's New Lab Partner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the long wait! I'll be better next time!
> 
> Also, as kind of a warning, in this chapter there's something kinda gross…not bad, just Dipper gets an injury that some people might not like reading about.

Dipper finished his homework an hour before he usually woke up. _Should I take a nap?_ He wondered. _Nah. I'll be fine. I'll just get tomorrow's…today's homework done._

Dipper opened his organizational planner and looked at what homework he would have that night. Since AP classes have to have a set schedule, teachers gave them theirs at the beginning of the year so they would know what they missed. Dipper used it to his advantage and did homework early.

_Let's see…Math worksheet, essays due in history and English, lab in chemistry today so the post-lab's due tomorrow, and a Latin test tomorrow so I have to study._

Dipper sighed. _Nothing I can get done early. Well, at least I can get a decent breakfast for once._

Dipper walked down the stairs and made himself a bowl of cereal. When you eat nothing but granola bars for breakfast every day, you start to savor the chances you get to eat cereal. And this was what Dipper was doing.

Mabel was surprised that Dipper woke up so early, but she didn't bring it up.

Dipper and Mabel left the house having a mild argument about what cereal was better. They both knew that they didn't care, but it was good fun.

Once again, Mabel left him to see her friends and Dipper walked to the library. He passed a group of jocks that looked at him like a pack of wolves. He continued looking foreword and tried not to think about them.

\---

Dipper groaned. _There's a lab in science. And since I'm the only one who doesn't have a regular partner…_

"Heya Pine Tree, care to explain why the teacher paired us up for the lab?"

Dipper sighed. _Here we go._ "Before you appeared out of nowhere, this class had thirty-one students. I was happily the only one without a lab partner. But now I have no choice but to be lab partners with you."

Bill pretended to look offended. "You could have put it a little kinder."

Dipper rolled his eyes and gave Bill a lab coat and goggles. "Pine Tree, aren't you gonna show me how to put these on?" Bill asked, holding them upside down.

Dipper glared and Bill said "Alright, grumpy. No jokes." He put the lab coat and goggles on.

As Dipper waited for the chemicals to react with each other, he asked Bill "So why are you here?"

Bill said "To see you, of course."

Dipper kept a straight face and Bill said "No seriously, I made a deal with someone and they specifically mentioned you."

Dipper showed no emotion. "What about Mabel?" He asked in a monotone voice.

Bill shook his head. "Nothing about her. Oh relax Pine Tree, I'm not going to hurt you, you know that, right?"

Dipper crossed his arms. "Uh, no Bill, I don't, actually." He said.

Bill said "Fine, then I'll tell you. I'm not going to hurt you. I'd have no physical form."

The chemicals finally reacted and Dipper recorded their reactions down in one of his notebooks. Then he stopped writing and disposed of the chemicals.

Up until class was about to end, Bill watched Dipper as if he was a bomb, set to explode at any second. When the bell rang, Dipper turned to Bill and said "If you touch Mabel, I will kill you." Then he walked away.

\---

Dipper passed by the cafeteria on his way to the library for lunch. He saw the group of jocks again. This time, they were watching him closer. Half of them got up. Dipper walked faster. They walked faster. Dipper started running. They followed.

"Get back here, nerd!" One of them yelled. Dipper sprinted out the school doors with the jocks following him closely behind.

\---

Dipper was used to running from various things trying to hurt him, but there had been trees and bushes for cover in the Falls. Here, there was nothing but grass and pavement.

Dipper glanced behind him. They're too close. He ran faster and with every step his side felt like it was going to burst.

 _I need cover,_ Dipper thought urgently, and just then he saw something directly to the left of him that would work perfectly. _A pine tree. I can climb it._

Dipper prepared himself for a sharp turn. Anything less than 90 degrees would give them an advantage.

 _Okay. Three_ , Dipper looked behind. They were gaining on him. _Two_ , Dipper planted his feet down firmly. _One,_ Dipper turned quickly.

He would have escaped if he remembered to pick his foot off the ground.

His kneecap slid from its usual spot to the outside of his leg and he fell forward on his hands and knees.

Dipper could only scream. "Somebody help!" He yelled, hoping someone could help him. _It hasn't slid back yet, why couldn't I have just made a good turn!_

Through his sobs and screams, Dipper heard the people chasing him say "let's get out of here" and run away.

Dipper was about to pass out. His arms weren't going to hold him off of his bad leg for much longer. And it hurt even worse by now. He was exhausted.

By the time someone came to him, Dipper couldn't focus on one thing. "Knee…out…hurts…" was all he could get out.

Whoever found him pulled him up and his knee slid back in as his leg extended. Dipper sobbed. The pain didn't stop. The person who helped him carried him to the nurse's office and explained what happened to the best of their knowledge. Dipper was in too much pain and too exhausted to think. He finally fell asleep.

\---

Journal entry 3

TODAY WAS A VERY PROGRESSIVE DAY. PINE TREE TRIED TO TEACH ME SCIENCE. HA! AS IF I DIDN'T KNOW THIS STUFF ALREADY! ITS JUST A MATTER OF THIS HUMAN BRAIN STORING IT CORRECTLY.

I TRIED TO FIND OUT HOW PINE TREE ALMOST DIED LAST NIGHT. DECIDED THAT THE DAY AFTER A POSSIBLY TRAUMATIC INCIDENT WOULDN'T BE THE BEST TIME TO ASK HIM. SO I ASKED SHOOTING STAR.

SHE WAS MAD AT ME FOR SOME REASON. SHE EVEN KICKED ME OUT OF HER LUNCH TABLE!

I ASKED HER WHAT HAPPENED TO PINE TREE LAST NIGHT. SHE WAS CONFUSED. I TOLD HER PINE TREE ALMOST DIED LAST NIGHT AND SHE DIDN'T BELIEVE ME. SHE WASN'T ANY HELP.

I FOUND A NEW GROUP TO EAT LUNCH WITH. IT'S A BUNCH OF JOCKS THAT WILL DO GREAT AS BODYGUARDS ONCE I CLIMB THEIR RANKS AND REACH THE TOP. 

THEY SHOW THEIR DOMINANCE OVER OTHER SOCIAL CIRCLES BY HAVING HALF THE GROUP BEAT UP PEOPLE ONE DAY AND THE OTHER HALF THE NEXT. I'M NOT ALLOWED TO FIGHT YET. I'M TOO "NEW."

TODAY THEY SAID THEY BEAT UP THIS KID WITHOUT EVEN TOUCHING HIM! HE WAS SUCH A KLUTZ THAT HE HURT HIMSELF BY RUNNING AWAY! I LAUGHED WHEN THEY TOLD ME. THEN THEY SAID THEY FOUND THEIR NEW "TARGET" WHICH IS CODE FOR "PERSON THEY HARASS EVERY DAY." I CAN TELL I'LL BE HAVING A LOT OF FUN WITH THESE GUYS.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any guesses for who found Dipper?


	5. Bill Gets a Visitor

Dipper woke up in his bed with his leg resting on a pile of pillows. His leg was swollen and hurt like someone was slowly crushing it.

"How did I get here?" Dipper asked himself. The last thing he remembered was his kneecap slipping and him falling on school grounds.

"Grunkle Ford carried you here."

Dipper jumped. He wasn't expecting someone else to be in the room with him. "Mabel?" He asked. "What do you mean Ford carried me here? Isn't he, like, thousands of miles away?"

Mabel shrugged. "He said something about "having business in this town" or something like that. He said he saw you on the ground screaming and took you to the nurse's office. Oh, she said to ice your leg." Mabel ran out and came back fifteen seconds later with an ice pack.

"Where's Ford now?" Dipper asked, taking the ice pack.

Mabel shrugged. "He said he had to meet up with someone about business."

"Where are Mom and Dad?" Dipper asked.

"Work still." Mabel said. "School just got out."

Dipper set the ice pack on his knee as gently as he could and found that no matter what he did, the pain wouldn't go away. It was a constant dull pain that came in waves and couldn't be stopped. The ice helped though.

 _Oh man,_ Dipper realized, _if it hurts this much just sitting here, it'll hurt a lot worse when I have to move. How will I get to the bathroom?_

"What were you doing for this to happen?" Mabel asked.

Dipper froze. _I could never tell Mabel about the jocks chasing me. She'd worry too much._

Dipper said "I finished lunch early," _blatant lies, I never even ate lunch today,_ "so I decided to go for a run," _with people who wanted to hurt me chasing me,_ "and I think I must have landed wrong or rolled my ankle or something."

_Please believe me please believe me please…_

Mabel nodded slowly. "Alright." She said.

 _Yes!_ Dipper thought prematurely.

"If you want to tell me what really happened, you know I'll listen." Mabel said. "Just, take care of yourself, okay?"

 _Busted_ , Dipper thought. He nodded in response to Mabel's question. Mabel left, and Dipper was alone in his room.

Dipper looked around his room and saw his backpack next to his bed, along with crutches and a knee brace. _Mabel must have grabbed my books before she left school._

 _Well, I might as well do something useful while I'm sitting here_ , Dipper thought, pulling his backpack onto his bed and taking out his work for that day.

\---

Ford was running. He was looking for a small house that anyone else would pass by without looking. If he got a feeling that he should ignore something, he looked.

And he found the house.

Ford slammed his fists on the door. "Cipher!" He yelled.

When Bill finally opened the door, he jumped back.

Bill put on a weak smile. "H-hey Sixer, how's it h-hanging?"

Ford glared and Bill was visibly shaking. "Cut the crap, Bill. I got the dream too. I know you almost failed."

"I-it wasn't my fault!" Bill stammered. "I c-couldn't s-stop it! I don't even know what happened-"

"You idiot! Of course you wouldn't. What, did you ask him?" Bill shook his head. "You asked Mabel?" This time, Bill nodded.

"She didn't know anything. I figured if there was a break in, she would hear…"

Ford hit the wall in frustration. "Dipper didn't almost die because someone tried to kill him. Do you think that's the only death? Murder and accidents?"

Bill was stumped. "What else could he almost die from?"

"Suicide, Bill! That's why I sent you here! I wasn't worried because someone was targeting Dipper. I was worried because he was depressed! He didn't have friends and he lost interest in the things he used to love. He even cleared out his locker so his family wouldn't have to after he killed himself!"

Ford had tears rolling down his angry face. Bill was shocked at this new information.

Ford took a deep breath and said "I sent you here to become his friend. To lessen his depression."

Bill said "I-I didn't know-"

"Of course you didn't." Ford said. "But you do now. And if you fail, I know that you're you're vulnerable now. I'll hunt you down and I won't rest until you're burning in Hell."

Ford turned to leave but before he walked away, he said "Right now, Dipper's injured and needs help at school. Don't mess up this opportunity to become his friend."

Ford walked away, leaving a terrified Bill Cipher in the open door.

\---

"Mom, Dad, We're going to say hi to Grunkle Stan while he's docked!" Mabel called. She ran out the door.

Dipper sighed. _Of course she forgot I can't walk_. Dipper put on the brace and took the crutches and got as far as the stairs before he stopped.

_How am I supposed to get down these every day?_

Dipper sat down at the top of the stairs and butt-scooted down. It took about five minutes to get all the way down.

He used his crutches to walk to the door. _How am I supposed to get this thing open?_

Just then, Mabel opened the door. "Sorry Dip! Got a little excited."

Dipper sighed and followed Mabel.

Mabel kept running ahead before remembering that Dipper was slower than normal. Every time, she apologized and would walk with him for ten feet or so before running ahead again.

Once they finally got to the docks, it didn't take long for Stan to find them.

Mabel ran ahead and gave Stan a hug, and Dipper sighed. Once he got there, Stan ruffled his hair and said "Heh, looks like you've been having a little too much fun, kid."

"Something like that." Dipper mumbled.

"Is Grunkle Ford here?" Mabel asked. "There's something we need to tell him."

Stan shook his head. "No, he hasn't been back yet. I'm sure he won't be gone long."

"Who won't be gone long?" asked a voice behind Dipper. Dipper turned his head and saw Ford, who looked angry.

"Hey Ford, these kids want to tell you something." Stan said. Ford nodded and waited.

Dipper sighed. "Bill's back. We think he possessed someone."

To Dipper's surprise, Ford didn't look surprised. "I know," he said, "that's what I was in town for. He didn't poses anyone. He's human, and vulnerable, and he's learning."

Dipper and Mabel looked at each other, confused. "What should we do?" Mabel asked.

Ford said "If I'm right, he's still learning about being human. If you two befriend him, he might see your example and change. It's the only option we've got."

Suddenly, an alarm from the ship went off. Stan ran inside and yelled "Hey Ford, we've got to go! There's this giant weird thing on the radar!"

"Crap," Ford muttered. "Sorry kids, we have to go. See you two later!"

Dipper and Mabel watched as their grunkles left.

Mabel turned around and skipped ahead of Dipper, then turned with an apologetic look on her face. Dipper walked after her just as slowly as he had before.

When they got home, Dipper's arms hurt as if they were bruised from the crutches pushing on them. His leg hurt and he was tired. He butt scooted up the stairs and put some pillows on his bed to keep his leg raised.

After changing into his pajamas, Dipper laid down in bed and fell asleep instantly.

\---

Journal entry 4

SIXER STOPPED BY AFTER I FINISHED WRITING. I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER FELT FEAR BEFORE. HE WARNED ME THAT IF I SCREW UP HE'LL KILL ME.

I ALWAYS THOUGHT THAT SOMEONE THREATENED PINE TREE AND SIXER WANTED ME TO FIGHT THEM OR SOMETHING. I NEVER CONSIDERED THAT PINE TREE WOULD BE THE REASON SIXER WAS WORRIED.

NOW I HAVE TO BEFRIEND PINE TREE AND SHOOTING STAR. SIXER SAID IT WOULD BE EASIER BECAUSE PINE TREE NEEDED HELP, BUT REGARDLESS IT'LL BE HARD.

IT DOESN'T TAKE A BRAINIAC TO FIGURE OUT THAT PINE TREE DOESN'T FIT IN. TOMORROW I'LL MANIPULATE THE GROUP I ATE LUNCH WITH AND BECOME THEIR LEADER SO PINE TREE CAN JOIN. MAYBE THAT WILL HELP HIM.


	6. Dipper Makes A Deal

Dipper had a rough morning.

Everything he did was painful. Getting out of bed, changing his clothes, even walking to the bathroom. Overnight, Mabel had knitted him some cushions so his crutches wouldn't hurt his arms. They helped, but they didn't take away all the pain. Still, he reminded himself to thank her later.

When Dipper put his backpack on, he realized just how heavy it was and how much it slowed him down. _There's was no way I'll be making it to my classes on time._

During his walk to school with Mabel, she kept forgetting how slow Dipper was. Feeling bad for making her wait, he told her to go ahead and meet her friends. Although Mabel tried to stay behind with him, she couldn't resist skipping to school.

Unsurprisingly, Dipper barely made it to school on time. Then he realized that his first class was on the second floor.

Tired and in pain, Dipper made his way to the elevator, which was conveniently located on the opposite side of the school. Plus, it took more than thirty seconds for Dipper to get in on the first floor and out the second.

When Dipper made it to his first class, he apologized to the teacher and sat in his seat, hoping that everyone would ignore him.

He didn't realize how hard he was crying until someone offered him a tissue. "Thanks." He mumbled, taking it.

Once Dipper calmed down enough to pay attention to class, he realized that it was Bill who gave him the tissue. Then he realized how much of class he must have missed.

When Dipper started breathing rapidly, Bill said "We're just watching a video. You don't need to cry."

Dipper didn't stop his erratic breathing. He couldn't. _Even if it is just a video, it'll take forever to find, and I don't have any time._

Bill made a thinking face. "Listen Pine Tree, how about I carry those books to all your classes for you?"

Dipper glared at Bill. _What, does he think that just because my leg is screwed up I'm weak?_ "I don't need any help, Cipher." Dipper spat.

Bill got angry. "What are you talking about? You can't possibly make it to any of your classes without me."

"I can manage on my own." Dipper said. _Ugh, I can't stand him! I'm perfectly capable of doing things on my own._

Bill sighed and said "Look kid, you have no reason to be angry. I'm just trying to help."

Dipper snapped.

"No reason to be angry?" Dipper asked whispering, reminding himself that he was still in a classroom, "You terrorized me and my sister all summer. You tried to destroy the universe. You betrayed my uncle and sent him to your dimension with a bounty on his head. Hell, you took over my body and hurt it just for the stupid journal! And don't get me started on the emotional damage. Anything that reminded me of you–handshakes, blue flashes of light, those stupid illuminati drawings everywhere–sent me back into memories of you, about to kill me and my sister! So yeah, I think I have a reason to be angry."

Dipper was seething. Bill didn't say anything for a long time.

"Let me make up for that." Bill said.

Dipper suppressed a laugh. "There's nothing you can do that'll make up for that. Try Mabel, she might be more forgiving."

Bill shook his head. "No, she almost killed me this morning."

"Good."

"No, I swear, I didn't do anything! She thought I screwed up your leg." Bill said defensively.

"I wonder why," Dipper mumbled.

Bill sighed. "Pine Tree, stop being so stubborn and be honest with yourself. You can't make it to your classes on time carrying all those books."

 _He has a point. It would be a lot easier if I had someone carry it for me_ , Dipper thought.

"Let me carry them for you. I swear, no tricks. Give me a chance." Bill said.

 _He kinda looks desperate._ Dipper wondered. _Should I trust him?_

_I can't believe I'm actually considering this._

Dipper sighed. _Well, what do I have to lose?_ he decided. He said "Fine. I'll let you carry my backpack."

Bill smiled–well, it's more of

a smirk, Dipper decided–and said "Great!"

"On one condition," Dipper said, enjoying the confused look on Bill's face, "after the next passing period, you leave me alone for the rest of the day."

Bill pouted. "Half of the day." He said.

Dipper glared and said "No. This isn't negotiable."

Bill laughed. "Of course it is, Pine Tree. Everything is negotiable if you try hard enough."

Dipper huffed and crossed his arms. "Don't call me Pine Tree," he said. "My name is Dipper."

"Actually it's-"

"Dipper, and you'll call me that if you want to carry my bag." Dipper said.

Bill hummed. "That's a pretty hefty sum, Pi…Dipper." Bill made a weird face. "That's gonna take some getting used to. Maybe I won't. There's no real incentive to calling you that, anyway."

Dipper sighed. "How about if you call me Dipper, and don't screw it up during the whole passing period, you can carry my bag for the next one."

Bill, after carefully thinking for a few moments, put his hand out and said "It's a deal!"

Dipper looked down at Bill's stretched out hand. "Do we have to shake?" He asked, uneasy.

Bill nodded. "Of course. A deal isn't sealed until there's a handshake." Dipper waited for Bill's serious face turn to laughter but it never happened. He sighed and shook Bill's hand.

\---

At the end of the day, Dipper was surprised at how well Bill kept his end of the deal to call him Dipper.

During the first passing period, Bill told Dipper how to find the video their class watched on the Internet. Dipper was, for once, grateful for Bill. He wouldn't be left behind the rest of the class.

The second passing period, Bill got to Dipper's classroom incredibly fast. Bill tried to make conversation about the weather, but neither of them had windows in any of their classrooms.

"Is this what awkwardness feels like?" Bill asked, scrunching his face.

Dipper laughed. "Yeah, doesn't feel very good, right?" he asked.

Bill shook his head. "No. It doesn't. I'll try to avoid this next time, Dipper."

The third passing period, Bill asked Dipper about his class, and kept up the conversation from there. Dipper was impressed that Bill had adjusted his conversation from the las period so well.

During the fourth passing period, to lunch, Dipper told Bill he ate lunch in the library. Against all his bad feelings, he asked "Do you want to join me?" Bill just shook his head, saying he'd made other arrangements.

The fifth passing period, Dipper waited for Bill to go back to the library, but he never showed up. Luckily for Dipper, his next class wasn't too far from the library.

The sixth passing period, Dipper was halfway from his class to the elevator when Bill found him. Dipper angrily asked "Where were you?"

Bill shrugged. "I forgot you weren't in the cafeteria." he said. Dipper stayed silent until he got to his class.

When school ended, Bill carried Dipper's bag to his locker, waiting for Dipper to say something. When he didn't, Bill said "I've consulted someone on human matters and after our previous interactions I've concluded that I should say sorry."

Dipper raised his eyebrow. "You going to say it?" He asked.

"But I already said it." Bill said.

Dipper shook his head, saying "Not in its proper apology form."

Bill sighed. "Then, Dipper, I'm sorry for leaving you to carry your backpack by yourself." He said.

Dipper almost lost his balance. _I wasn't expecting him to actually apologize. He's actually learning to be more human._

Before Dipper could say anything, Bill asked "Could you take your backpack the rest of the way to your locker?" Dipper nodded. "Okay, good. I'll be right back." Bill took off and Dipper smiled. _He's trying to make up for leaving me in the library. That's kind of cool._

\---

"Look, it's the runt who beat himself up."

Dipper recognized that voice. It told him to slow down and stop running. He turned and saw the jocks who chased him and the rest of their group. _Oh no._

Another one of the jocks spoke. Dipper assumed it was their leader. "I'm actually impressed at how fast you ran." He said. "It would have taken a while for us to catch you if you hadn't, you know, broken your knee."

"Dislocated." Dipper said.

"Do I look like I care?" He asked. He turned to his comrades and said "Anyway, now that we've found him alone again, what should we do? Any ideas?"

"He still has one good leg!" One said.

"Both of his arms are still intact!" Another said.

"We could see how much he can fight back!" Said another.

Dipper was shaking. He hated his body for showing fear.

The one who Dipper assumed was the leader said "All great suggestions. But I think we should let our new leader decide."

Dipper looked up and almost screamed when he saw who the new leader was. He had expected a bigger, tougher jock had taken over.

This was worse.

Bill was the leader.

Dipper would have screamed, or cried, or asked what was going on if he hadn't been so terrified. _He must have been planning this all day…I thought he was trying to be good…_

_I can't believe I let him trick me like that!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since Bill doesn't bring his journal to school, and there's no way he could get away from this situation to write in it anyway, there's no journal entry at the end of this chapter.


	7. Bill's Last Chance

Dipper glared at Bill with pure hatred. _I can't believe I actually believed he was good. And he's in charge of the jocks._

_I'm so screwed._

Dipper didn't break eye contact with Bill. He stood up as straight as he could as a sign that said _go on. Do whatever you're going to do. I won't back down._ For once, Dipper didn't tremble.

Then Bill's serious face changed. "Nah, too easy." He said. After hearing sounds of confusion from the jocks, Bill said "Come on guys, you can't really think that this is fair. His leg's all screwed up. Beating him up? Piece of cake. Where's the fun in that? No, how about we play hide and seek."

Everyone was confused. _Where's Bill going with this?_ Dipper wondered.

Finally, one of the jocks said "Why though? It's pointless and he might get away."

Bill said "Well, we've got to make it interesting. Here's what I'm saying. We chill out outside for a while, say, five minutes, and give Pine Tree here time to hide. Then the first person to find him decides what we do with him. And there's no way he could get away in five minutes. Did you see how slow he is?"

Dipper glared at Bill as he took Dipper's backpack. The jocks agreed to Bill's plan, and they turned to go outside. Bill looked over his shoulder and said "Tick tock Pine Tree. Your five minutes start now."

\---

Dipper was hiding in the closest safe spot he could think of. The spot he ate lunch in the library. He could fit himself in the surprisingly large space between the bookshelf and the wall, and he did so every day after the librarians told him that food wasn't allowed.

Dipper didn't know how much time passed since Bill started the five minutes. He'd never been good at telling how much time passed. _Has it been two minutes? Five? Ten? Maybe they've given up already…_

Approaching footsteps proved him wrong.

Dipper tried to keep himself calm. It didn't work. He could almost hear his heart beating. His breathing was growing more rapid and loud. _Please pass by…please don't hear me…_

"Psst, Dipper," whispered Bill, approaching Dipper's hiding spot, "help me out here, where are you?" Dipper could see Bill's panicked face through a gap in the books. Bill's seemingly real panic surprised him.

Bill walked past the opening of Dipper's hiding spot. Dipper almost sighed with relief. Then Bill stopped, turned, and poked his head through the gap between the wall and the bookshelf.

Dipper backed up as far as he could go. Breathing became a struggle, and Dipper cried uncontrollably. _He found me. He decides how they…how I…_

Suddenly, Bill rushed forward and covered Dipper's mouth. "Dipper, quiet. If they find us, you're done for. We don't have much time." Bill looked through the books.

Seeing Dipper's confusion, Bill rolled his eyes and said "Oh come on, I'm not going to hurt you."

Dipper tore Bill's hand off his face and angrily asked "Then why did you set up this game? Why did you send the jocks after me?"

"I didn't know it was you!" Bill said loudly, checking through the books, then continuing quieter, "They told me about a kid who hurt himself running away. I assumed it was someone else." Bill sighed and looked down. "I screwed up, and you're in danger because of it."

Bill looked up. "But I can fix it. Mabel has your backpack and is taking it home. I know where everyone else is right now, and I can get you out safely."

Dipper glared at Bill. "Why should I trust you?" He asked. "You could be lying. It wouldn't be the first time."

Bill winced. "I know. Please Dipper, let me make up for it. Trust me just this once."

Dipper didn't like it. Bill never admits when he did something wrong. _He looks serious. But he might just be a good actor._ Dipper closed his eyes and thought.

Dipper considered his options. He could tell Bill to leave. Then Bill would either tell the jocks where he was or let them find him themselves. He could wait with Bill until the jocks found them. Dipper could try to make a run for it, until he realized that he couldn't run. He was so slow and his crutches were so loud that they would easily find him before he made it to the elevator. All four solutions led to him being found by the jocks.

 _If I go with Bill, and he's lying, it'll be the same as if I walked out myself. And if Bill isn't lying, there's a big chance we won't make it._ Dipper sighed and looked up at Bill. _But going with Bill is the only chance I have to make it out safely._

"Fine. I'll go with you." Dipper said. "But if you don't get me out of here safely, you're going to be exorcised," he warned.

Bill smiled and said "Good. We don't have much time left." Bill stood up and helped Dipper balance on his good foot. He handed Dipper his crutches. "Here, hold these. Don't drop them or hit them on anything."

Dipper raised an eyebrow. "Uh, I kinda need these to walk."

Bill shook his head. "No, they're too loud and slow. I'll have to carry you. This way we can go down the stairs instead of taking the elevator."

Dipper's eyes widened. "You're going to carry me down the stairs? What if you trip or something?"

Bill shrugged. "Then we're both screwed. Here, get on my back, unless you've got another idea."

Unfortunately, Dipper didn't. He got on Bill's back and grabbed his crutches. As soon as he had a solid grip, Bill grabbed his legs and ran.

Dipper was terrified. Bill ran as fast as he could and with almost no regard for safety. He jumped over small obstacles and came to sudden stops when approaching corners. When they reached the stairs, Dipper thought he would be more careful. Instead, Bill jumped down two stairs at a time.

Bill only stopped when he reached the doors. Dipper heard a group of people walking down the hall. Dipper heard the words "search" and "hiding place."

"Come on Bill, what's taking so long?" Dipper asked in a hushed voice.

Bill said "I, um, I can't open this door without hurting your leg."

Dipper huffed and pushed the door open using his hand that didn't hold his crutches. Bill said "That works," and ran out the door.

Dipper saw Mabel on the edge of the school grounds, his backpack next to her feet. When she saw them, she yelled "Dipper!" and ran toward them.

Bill shook his head. "I thought I told you to run home as fast as you could!" He said.

Mabel shook her head. "Not without Dipper." She said, smiling. Dipper smiled back at her.

"Yes, that's very touching, but there's a small army of muscular people hunting Dipper and we need to go now," Bill urged. Mabel nodded and picked up Dipper's backpack. They ran to the Pines home, not stopping or looking back.

\---

Dipper was sitting on his bed, arms crossed, glaring at Bill, who was sitting on a chair in front of him. Mabel was standing next to Dipper, her hands on her hips. She was Dipper's lie detector.

Bill was uncomfortable. Dipper knew he was. Nobody spoke since they got home. Everyone was waiting for the other to talk first.

Finally, Bill said "I know you guys want an explanation."

Nobody moved. The only sound was the ticking of a clock.

Bill sighed. "What do you want to know?" He asked, growing more uneasy with every passing second.

Dipper enjoyed seeing Bill's uneasiness. He felt in control for once. But he knew that Bill wouldn't explain without a question asked, Dipper said "Tell us who you made a deal with and why."

Bill looked slightly relieved that the interrogation wouldn't be so one sided. "Someone was worried about you, Dipper." Bill said. "Someone knew you were in danger, so they summoned me. They said they would give me a physical form, and, uh, they technically delivered."

Dipper's expression didn't change. "Tell us who dealt with you." He said.

Bill shook his head. "I can't. Really, it's the rules. Unless the person gives me permission to tell, or you already know, I tell you who I made a deal with."

Dipper glared. "What am I in danger of then?" He asked. Bill just shook his head and looked down.

Dipper sighed. "Can't tell me? Well then, tell us what Ford talked to you about yesterday." Dipper expected a straight answer. A quick one, probably about anomalies or science. He didn't get one.

Dipper waited for an answer. Mabel understood Bill's silence first.

"That idiot!" Mabel yelled. Dipper and Bill jumped. This was the first thing Mabel said since they got home. "He told us he didn't know–how could he make the same mistake twice?"

At first, Dipper was confused at her outburst. Then he realized who and what she was talking about.

"It was Ford!" Dipper realized. _How is that possible? He would have never…what could he think I'd be in danger of?_ Then Dipper said "Well, who else could have tricked Bill into a human form?"

Once Dipper and Mabel's anger towards Ford faded so they could continue their interrogation, Bill said "Before any more questions, can I try to explain something?" Dipper and Mabel looked at each other and nodded.

Bill took a deep breath. "I know I messed up earlier today. But I only had the best intentions. Dipper seemed lonely, so I took over the easiest group so he wouldn't have to eat lunch alone. My first day they told me about a kid who hurt himself running away, but I didn't know it was Dipper. I thought it was just a coincidence they both got hurt on the same day. Ford told me to become friends with Dipper, so I carried his bags to class. I figured at the end of the day I'd surprise him with new friends, but they threatened Dipper before I could introduce them. I never meant for Dipper to get hurt. I know I messed up. But I'm asking if you would forgive me and let me start over."

Neither twin expected Bill to be asking for forgiveness. Dipper looked at Mabel, who said "He's not lying. He's being sincere."

 _I have to admit it is pretty convincing,_ Dipper thought. _Should I give him another chance?_

Dipper sighed. "I'm going to regret this." He mumbled. He looked Bill in the eyes and said "I forgive you."

Bill smiled. Dipper still didn't completely trust him, but he didn't exactly blame him for the jocks anymore. _After all, Bill did save me._

"You won't regret this!" Bill said excitedly. Dipper wasn't so sure he wouldn't regret it, but it was too late to be having any doubts.

_I'll just have to deal with Bill until he thinks I'm safe from danger._

\---

Bill left not long after he was forgiven. Dipper still had homework and pretty much forced Bill and Mabel out. Dipper could hear them talking in Mabel's room for a few minutes, but didn't understand anything they said.

As Dipper did his homework, a thought popped up every so often. _How am I going to avoid the jocks at school now?_ Dipper decided to ignore it. He'd deal with it at school tomorrow.

\---

Journal entry 5

I SCREWED UP. I THOUGHT I WAS DOING GOOD THINGS BUT THEY ENDED UP ONLY HURTING DIPPER.

THOSE PEOPLE I MADE FRIENDS WITH FOR DIPPER, I BECAME THEIR LEADER. IT WAS EASY. THE ONLY PROBLEM WAS THAT THE PERSON WHO FELL WAS DIPPER SO WHEN I WAS ABOUT TO INTRODUCE THEM TO HIM, THEY TRIED TO BEAT HIM UP.

I MANAGED TO LET DIPPER HIDE, SAYING IT WAS A GAME, AND I GOT HIM OUT SAFELY. BUT I RUINED ANY FRIENDSHIP WE HAD. NOW I HAVE TO START OVER.

BEFORE THAT, I MANAGED TO MAKE A DEAL WITH HIM–I'D CALL HIM DIPPER IF HE LET ME CARRY HIS BOOKS TO CLASS. (I ALSO MADE A SIMILAR DEAL WITH MABEL. SHE PROMISED TO MAKE ME A SWEATER. )

I THINK I MADE FRIENDS WITH DIPPER, BUT I RUINED IT. I'LL HAVE TO TRY HARDER IN THE FUTURE.

I CAN'T PUT DIPPER IN DANGER ANYMORE, AND IT'S NOT JUST BECAUSE OF MY DEAL. I THINK MY NEW HUMAN EMOTIONS ARE STARTING TO AFFECT ME MORE.

IS THIS WHAT FRIENDSHIP FEELS LIKE FOR HUMANS?


	8. Dipper Knows Who He Can Trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I couldn't get this chapter out sooner. It's the end of the school year, so I've been busy with school work and band and everything and just didn't have time to write. But that also means, after finals next week, that school won't be a distraction until September. So thanks for being pacient, I hope you like this one. (I added my favorite lab from my chemistry class, so sorry if you don't get what's happening. I tried my best to explain)

Dipper really didn't want to go to school. He didn't want to deal with the jocks, or homework, or Bill's wavering loyalty.

"You should stay home today, bro," said Mabel when Dipper told her about his worries.

Dipper shook his head. He said "I don't want to miss any school. It would probably make me more stressed than I am now." _It isn't worth the extra stress._

\---

Dipper arrived to his first class late. Though not as late as the day before, he still missed most of the instructions for the lab.

 _Lucky for me, my lab partner saw all of it._ Dipper sat down and asked Bill "Hey, what lab are we doing today?"

"We're doing a nutrition lab." Bill said. Dipper frowned. _What does that mean?_ "Hey, I didn't make it up." Bill said. "And I have no idea what it is,"

Dipper doubted Bill. He checked the schedule to see what the lab really was. "Titration." Dipper said. It's titration, not nutrition. I thought you would have a ton of science knowledge."

Bill huffed. "I did. It's this stupid human form. It's like my knowledge was infinite, an unending ocean. Now all I have is a puddle. I don't remember much about tire rotations."

"Titration." Dipper corrected, stifling a laugh. "Luckily I know what to do. I've done this lab before."

Bill was still grumpy. _He's probably mad I know more than him at the moment,_ Dipper thought.

Dipper and Bill moved to a lab table. "Okay, what's going on?" Bill asked. "There's like fifty things here."

Dipper said "Clean an Erlenmeyer flask, I'll get the chemicals." Bill looked around and made a confused face. Dipper sighed. "It's wide at the bottom and thinner at the top. No, put that down, that's a funnel." Dipper sighed and picked up the right flask. "Here, just clean this."

Dipper left to get the chemicals. He clumsily walked over using one crutch to have a free hand to hold the chemicals with. When he came back Bill was drying the flask.

"So, what's that and what are we doing?" Bill asked.

Dipper stifled a smirk and said "In the pipet is bromothymol blue, and the graduated cylinder has hydrochloric acid. We're going to put the bromothymol blue into the acid and it's going to turn yellow. Then we'll add sodium hydroxide, a strong base, from the burette to the acid, which will make it turn blue if we add too much. We're trying to find a balance in the pH and make it green."

Bill put his head on the lab table and groaned. Dipper smiled. He didn't hold back on the vocabulary at all, and he was enjoying knowing more than Bill.

"Alright, it's not super complicated. Here, I'll show you." Dipper said. Bill looked up.

Dipper put the acid into the flask and added five drops of bromothymol blue. Bill's eyes widened when Dipper stirred it. "It turned yellow, it was blue before!"

Dipper nodded. "That's because it's an acid, and it has a pH of less than seven," he explained.

Dipper put the flask under the burette and rotated the knob on the side so only a few drops came out. "This base has a pH of more than seven, so I'm using this to balance the pH of the acid so it gets to seven." Bill watched eagerly as Dipper added more and more base to the yellow acid.

Finally, the base was nearing its titration point. Bill noticed this and said "Hey, it's turning green! Are we done?"

Dipper shook his head. "No. See, if I mix it, it goes back to yellow. We're almost there though."

Each drop made the mixture green, then it turned to yellow. Then, each drop made it blue before turning yellow.

Bill was watching the flask closely. Then, Dipper added a couple drops of base and the mixture turned blue and it stayed blue. _Crap. I added too much._

Bill frowned as Dipper dumped the mixture down the sink. "Wait, is that it?" Bill asked. "I thought it had to be green."

Dipper sighed. "It's supposed to be green, but it turns blue like that if you add too much." He said.

Bill frowned. "All that work and we did it wrong?" He asked, disappointed.

Dipper said "Look around. Is anyone succeeding on the first try? No, they aren't. We're not supposed to. We're going to use the information gathered from this and we use it to do the next test." Dipper continued explaining as he cleaned the flask. "We used about eleven milliliters of acid, so next time we can add nine or ten and then start to be careful. It'll take less time." Bill nodded in understanding and Dipper got more acid.

Dipper put the acid in the flask, dropped some bromothymol blue into the flask with it, and added nine milliliters of base to it, with Bill watching eagerly. Then Dipper added more a few drops at a time until the mixture turned blue before going to yellow.

Dipper looked over to Bill, who was watching the flask with his eyes wide open. _He looks really interested in this. It's kinda cute._ "You want to do the last few drops?" Dipper asked.

Bill looked up at him in disbelief and said "You don't think I'll mess it up?"

Dipper shrugged. "It's not that big of a deal if you do. Just twist the knob really fast so only one drop comes out. Then wait for me to stir before adding another. Got that?" Dipper said. Bill nodded.

Bill twisted the knob on the side of the burette and the mixture turned green, but only for a few seconds. Bill added another, to the same effect. And another. And another. After the fifth drop, the mixture turned completely blue as Dipper shook the flask. Bill looked disappointed.

Suddenly, the mixture turned green and stayed green. Dipper and Bill looked at each other excitedly and high fived. "We did it!" Bill said enthusiastically, drawing the attention of half the class.

Dipper recorded the information down and started cleaning the flask when he noticed Bill staring at him. "What?" Dipper asked.

Bill shrugged. "I like it when you smile, Dipper," He said, "It makes your face better."

"Is that a compliment?" Dipper asked, raising an eyebrow.

Bill looked confused. "Of course. I said your face looks better than usual right now. Isn't that–isn't that something nice to say?"

Dipper laughed. _He's trying, I'll give him that_. He went to get more chemicals, and he enjoyed the look of pure joy on Bill's face when he realized they would repeat the experiment.

\---

When Dipper went to his usual spot in the library to eat lunch, Mabel was waiting for him. "No Dip, you're not eating here anymore." She said. "From now on, I'm eating lunch with you. Come on, let's find an empty table in the lunchroom."

Mabel didn't let Dipper argue. She made him go to the lunch room with her and find a table

Before they got to the lunch room, Dipper heard a conversation in a side hall. Recognizing the voices, he made Mabel stop. She was confused at first, but upon hearing the voices she fell silent and listened with Dipper.

"You're weak!" someone yelled.

Someone else, Dipper recognized it as Bill, said "I'm not weak! All I'm saying is we don't need to hurt him. It's not amusing anymore."

One of the quieter jocks spoke up. "Ha! That's not it. I saw you two being buddies in between classes. You've gone soft, Cipher. What, is he your boyfriend? Did his gayness infect you?"

A tougher jock said "If that's the case, then get out. We don't want guys like that here. Nobody does."

Dipper winced at _we don't want guys like that._ It was a familiar line to Dipper. It's partially why he didn't try to make friends.

Dipper was expecting Bill to laugh it off, to say it was a test or something. To tell them he was only amusing Dipper before betraying him again. He thought Bill would come up with a plan to win back their loyalty.

He was very wrong.

Bill exploded. "So what?" He yelled, "I suggested that you shouldn't demonstrate power by almost killing defenseless people and you use the word gay to insult me? You guys are such idiots, it's not even an insult! And even if I did get soft, I'd die before I get as cold as you! And no, he's not my boyfriend, but he's still under my protection from you jerks. And I swear if you lay one finger on him, you're going to be very sorry."

Dipper couldn't believe his ears. _He's…he's defending me. Our friendship wasn't a trick. He wasn't ever going to betray me._ His eyes formed tears as he realized _Bill isn't protecting me because Ford forced him to…he's doing it because he wants to._

Dipper heard feet shuffling, then the sound of fists hitting skin, and then a cry of pain. "Let's get out of here," said one of the jocks, then they ran out and came face to face with Dipper and Mabel. 

Both groups froze and stared at the other. Dipper noticed a nasty black eye on the biggest one. They stayed silent until the leader of the jocks said "It's not fun anymore. Come on guys, let's go."

Dipper and Mabel turned the corner once they left and saw Bill, standing perfectly fine, except for the look of annoyance on his face. Bill looked up and jumped at the sight of the twins.

"How on earth did you manage to dodge during that fight?" Mabel asked.

Bill shrugged. "Easy. I hit first. Took out the smaller one and used their pain as a distraction to punch the big one as hard as I could. And shouldn't you two be eating? Lunch ends in like ten minutes."

Mabel huffed. Dipper knew what that meant. She didn't want to leave with questions unanswered, but she had no choice. "Fine," she said, "But we're talking about everything. After school you're coming over to our house for a sleepover.

Bill shrugged. "Alright. Bye. I've got to ice my hand." He took off towards the nurse's office, leaving the confused twins to find a table by themselves.

Mabel was silent during lunch, which was extremely uncharacteristic of her. Dipper didn't know what to make of it. But before he said anything, the bell rang and they parted ways.

\---

Bill met up with Dipper and Mabel right outside the school and asked "So, what's this sleepover thing all about?"

Mabel's face lit up and she enthusiastically said "Well, you see, we watch movies, and stay up late, and eat tons of food that's bad for us, and tell each other secrets and-"

Dipper could see Bill's excited expression turn to an overwhelmed one.

"You're rambling," Dipper told Mabel. He turned to Bill and said "Just go grab some overnight stuff, then come by our house." Dipper smiled. "It'll be fun."

Bill mirrored Dipper's smile and said "Okay then. See you guys in a few minutes." Then he turned and took off.

Dipper and Mabel continued their walk home. "So, why'd you invite him for a sleepover?" Dipper asked.

Mabel said "I thought it would be a good way to get to know him and introduce him to normal human stuff. Plus you really need a break from all this school stuff." She grabbed the textbook Dipper was holding. "So no touching your homework until tomorrow afternoon."

Dipper groaned. "But Mabel–"

"No buts," Mabel declared, "and nothing will get me to change my mind!"

Dipper sighed. _It's no use arguing with her._ "Fine," he said, "as long as you let me pick the first game we play and first movie we watch."

"Seems like Bill's rubbing off on you," Mabel teased. "But yeah, that seems fair. Anyway, let's get home so we can warn Mom and Dad about Bill coming over."

Mabel skipped ahead but before she got too far, she turned around, apologized, and walked slowly with Dipper, making conversation about that evening's plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No journal entry for this chapter, but there will definitely be one next chapter.


	9. Bill's First Sleepover

It was half an hour before Bill showed up at the Pines house.

Dipper, who had a messy room to clean up, was fine with Bill's arrival time. He assumed Mabel would be too, because it would give her time to plan the night and make snacks unhealthier.

When Bill finally arrived, Mabel was slightly ticked off that he arrived so late. She got over it before Dipper butt-scooted down the stairs.

The first thing Dipper noticed was the amount of "Mabelized" food on the kitchen table, including two pitchers of Mabel Juice. The second thing Dipper noticed was Mabel showing Bill the joys of eating raw cookie dough that she prepared.

Bill was cautious at first, especially when Mabel mentioned salmonella, but once he took a bite Mabel had to fight him for the bowl.

"Hey guys, save some for me too," Dipper said, inching his way towards them on his crutches.

Mabel looked up to acknowledge Dipper's presence and Bill used the distraction to his advantage. He pulled the bowl out of Mabel's hands and ran across the kitchen, where he waved at Dipper.

Mabel sighed at the loss of cookie dough, then she turned to Dipper and said "Mom and Dad are going out tonight. They'll come home and leave at about five, but then they'll be gone until like, eleven."

Dipper nodded. It was typical for his parents to go out on a Friday. "So where's party central going to be?" He asked.

Mabel said "I was thinking your room. Bill's gonna sleep in there, and you have limited movement, so it makes the most sense, right?" Dipper nodded.

Ten minutes later, all the food was upstairs. Bill insisted on carrying Dipper upstairs, and Dipper was feeling too lazy to argue or try to reverse-butt-scoot up the stairs.

"So what's first on the agenda?" Dipper asked Mabel.

"Oh, I was thinking we could watch a movie or play a game or something." Mabel turned to Bill and said "But I think our guest should decide."

\---

The horror movie Dipper picked was terrible. It was old, the acting was awful, and the overall judgement of the characters was just bad. Which is why Dipper chose it. Dipper had already watched the movie when he used to hang out with Wendy. The only reason he chose the movie was to watch Bill and Mabel yell at the screen.

"What was that?" Mabel asked after the movie ended. "What about that movie was so good that we had to suffer through it?"

With a smug grin on his face, Dipper said "Your reactions."

Mabel frowned and sulked for a few minutes. Bill, however, had a completely different reaction. Although Dipper couldn't pinpoint Bill's exact emotion, he could tell he was surprised at Dipper's answer and liked it.

After the movie, Dipper and Mabel's parents arrived, surprising them with pizza. After introducing Bill to them, and Bill made a decent first impression, their parents left them for the rest of the night.

When Bill took a slice of pizza, he looked at it for five minutes before asking "What's so great about a slab of of bread with fancy tomatoes and cheese on it?"

Mabel laughed and told him to eat it and find out.

Bill picked up his slice of pizza and glared at it for thirty seconds before taking a small bite. His eyes widened and he ate the rest of his pizza quickly.

Once their hunger was satisfied, Dipper chose to play Uno. He figured it would be easy to teach Bill, and he was right.

(Bill especially loved the draw four card.)

"Alright, so after twenty rounds of uno," Mabel said, "I won five, Dipper won seven, and Bill won eight. Since Bill won the most, he gets to skip a round of Mabel Juice shots."

"Lucky," Dipper said, wishing he could have won just one more game. _I can't ever make it past round six._

After describing Mabel Juice to a confused Bill, Mabel said it was her turn to pick what they do. She left to get something from her room.

Mabel came back with a bag of her knitting supplies and said that they were just going to talk.

"So what's it like being a demon?" Mabel asked, looking up from her knitting.

Bill said "I don't know. What do you mean? I mean, it's the only thing I've known. And I don't know how to describe it so you would understand it.

"Compare it to being human," Dipper suggested, "I mean, you're human now, what was it like before?"

Bill thought for a moment. He said "Well, being a human is a lot more cramped. These flesh bags you guys haul around–it's tiring compared to before, when I was pure energy."

Bill thought for a few more minutes before saying "And humans have more emotions, which came with the flesh bag. Before, it was simple. You were either satisfied or not. If you saw someone with more than you had, you wouldn't be jealous, you would be dissatisfied. Then, when you took whatever it was, you would become satisfied and they would become dissatisfied."

Bill sighed. "But now…I've looked up emotions. There are so many. Like embarrassment? I experienced it. And I hate it. And panic? It's the worst."

Mabel said "But you've probably been happy and stuff too, right?"

Bill shrugged. "I guess so. I mean I've had fun, which is like triple satisfaction. And relief feels good after I've been panicked for a while. And I don't know what it's like to be able to identify emotions right away like you guys, who have been feeling them for your entire lives. I still don't know what I'm feeling most of the time."

"Maybe you could describe a feeling to us and we could help you identify it," Dipper suggested.

"You would really do that?" Bill asked. Dipper and Mabel nodded.

"Any feeling you want us to name?" Mabel asked.

Bill thought and said "Well, it's hard to describe."

"Just do your best," said Dipper.

Bill took a deep breath. "It's kind of like…I'm emotionally attached to a person in a way that makes me want to be around them. I want to see them happy, like I hate seeing them sad and kinda want to get rid of their sadness."

 _Sounds like friendship_ , Dipper thought. But then Bill continued talking.

"And when I talk to them I feel…different, like in a way that's good and bad at the same time. It's like I'm embarrassed, but there's no reason to be, and I'm also happy. And being around them, and seeing them smile, it makes my stomach feel like what happens when I sit on my leg for too long."

Dipper's jaw dropped at Bill's description and Mabel made a sound only dogs should hear. She said "Bill! The emotion you're feeling is love!"

Bill was not expecting that answer.

Bill's eyes widened and he stared into space, as if he was looking at his memories in a new light.

Mabel said "Alright, you have got to tell me who your crush is."

Bill looked surprised at her statement. "Isn't it supposed to be a secret?" He asked. "I mean, isn't it usually, for humans?"

Dipper shook his head and said "Mabel's obsessed with relationships. Trust me, it's easier to tell her than to have her find out for herself."

Bill looked nervous, and a little embarrassed, and he looked around the room, possibly looking for a way out of the conversation. Mabel kept urging him to tell her.

Finally, Bill couldn't take the pressure anymore and he said "Marcus Brown."

Dipper and Mabel looked at each other and laughed. Bill, who was still nervous, asked "What-what's so funny?"

Dipper said "I kind of dated him last year."

Mabel's attention changed from Bill to Dipper as she said "Kind of? There was no 'kind of' about it! It was true love."

Bill looked uncomfortable. _Maybe he thinks I might still like Marcus_ , Dipper thought, so he said "It wasn't exactly true love. We broke up after a few months. It's no big deal."

"Liar," Mabel said to Dipper. She turned to Bill and said "Oh I have the perfect matchmaking idea for you two. Okay, so we get a giant-"

Bill looked like he was about to die, so Dipper said "Mabel, he just learned what love is. Give him a while to learn more before forcing them to date."

Mabel gasped and said "I'm sorry Bill, I got carried away. But seriously, if you want help, just ask."

Bill nodded, but he still looked nervous. Dipper asked "So how do you know Marcus?"

Bill said "He's in a couple of my classes. He talks to me sometimes, and I can ask him questions, like what should I do in a particular situation."

Mabel was smiling. Dipper knew she was planning how I get them together in at least ten different ways, but for reasons he can't explain, it bothered him. _For some reason I don't want them to get together. I'm over Marcus._

_But what if I'm not? I mean, our relationship ended mutually, and I had a girlfriend between then and now, but what if I still have feelings for him? I mean, I think I don't…but then again I didn't the first time until Mabel pointed it out to me._

Dipper thought hard about the situation, and decided that no, Marcus was just a distant friend, and he didn't have feelings for him. _But something still makes me uncomfortable about Bill and Marcus…_

When Dipper turned his attention back to Mabel and Bill, he found that the conversation had changed to something else. He joined in.

\---

The three of them talked for a while longer and watched a couple movies before Dipper and Mabel's parents made Mabel go to her room for bed. (Dipper was relieved that Mabel Juice shots had been forgotten.)

Bill left to go change into pajamas (after rambling about how strange the ritual was) in the bathroom and left Dipper to change in his room.

Dipper changed his shirt easily, but had quite a bit of trouble changing into his pajama pants.

Dipper took off his brace and tried to take off his pants normally, but when he moved his injured knee slightly, the pain was overwhelming.

Bill knocked on the door and Dipper said "Don't come in!"

After a couple minutes, Dipper finally got his jeans off. When he finally put his pajama pants on, he couldn't explain how it happened, but the top half of him fell off his bed.

"What's happening in there?" Bill asked through the door. "I heard a bump."

"Nothing," Dipper said, trying   
to get himself unstuck without hurting his knee.

"Do you need help?" Bill asked.

"No," Dipper said stubbornly. _I'll get out of this myself,_ he thought, but his neck was starting to hurt and he had a headache from the blood rushing to his head.

Dipper shifted his body and he thought he was in a position to get back on his bed, but he only made himself more stuck.

Sighing, Dipper said "Yes, I could use some help."

Bill opened the door and stood there, staring at Dipper in disbelief for ten seconds before laughing. Dipper did his best to glare at Bill, but it wasn't very effective.

Finally, Bill stopped laughing and said "Alright, let's get you out of this." He picked Dipper up and put him back on his bed, being careful to not move his leg too much.

"Thanks," Dipper said. "You're never going to let me forget about this, are you." Bill smiled and shook his head.

Without Mabel to guide the conversation, the two boys awkwardly avoided eye contact before Dipper suggested they get some sleep.

Bill turned off the light and turned on a lamp next to the sleeping bag he would sleep on. Dipper could hear him writing something.

After a few minutes, Dipper said "Hey Bill?"

The writing stopped. "Yes?" said Bill.

Dipper said "I…I wanted to say thanks for defending me today. It really means a lot."

Bill said "No problem, Dipper. I don't want to see a friend get hurt." Bill paused, as if he had said something wrong. "I mean, we're friends, right?"

Dipper smiled. Part of him couldn't believe that this was the same Bill who had tried to wipe out the universe. _He's just a teenager now. Harmless and unsure of anything. I thought I'd just have to deal with him until we could get rid of him…but I actually enjoy his company._ Dipper said "Yeah Bill, we're friends."

Dipper heard Bill go back to writing. He found himself becoming less awake by the second and before he knew it, he had fallen asleep.

\---

Journal entry 6

TODAY WAS EVENTFUL.

I LEARNED THAT MY MIND, AT THE MOMENT, IS VERY FINITE. THERE WAS A LAB IN SCIENCE AND I KNEW NOTHING ABOUT IT. DIPPER KNEW ALL ABOUT IT THOUGH, SO IT WAS FINE. HE SEEMED EXCITED TO TEACH ME ABOUT IT, AND HE SMILED DURING THE ENTIRE LAB.

SEEING DIPPER SMILE SOMEHOW MADE ME FEEL HAPPY, IN A WAY THAT'S DIFFICULT TO EXPLAIN. I TOLD HIM HE LOOKED GOOD WITH A SMILE AND HE WAS CONFUSED. I MUST HAVE PHRASED IT WRONG. I MEANT FOR IT TO BE A COMPLIMENT.

DURING LUNCH TODAY I MET THE IDIOTS WHO TRIED TO HURT DIPPER. OR RATHER, THEY FOUND ME. I WAS MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS WHEN THEY SURROUNDED AND INTERROGATED ME. THEY BASICALLY SAID I COMMITTED TREASON AND TRIED TO INSULT ME SO I PUNCHED THEIR LEADER AND TOLD THEM TO LEAVE DIPPER ALONE.

APPARENTLY, DIPPER AND MABEL HEARD THE ENTIRE EXCHANGE. MABEL INVITED ME TO A SLEEPOVER, SO I'M WRITING THIS IN THEIR HOUSE.

I HAD COOKIE DOUGH AND PIZZA FOR THE FIRST TIME. I CAN NOW SAY I HAVE FAVORITE FOODS.

DIPPER CHOSE TO WATCH A HORRIBLE MOVIE FOR THE PURPOSE OF WATCHING MABEL AND ME REACT TO IT. I THINK I FELT PRIDE? MAYBE A BIT OF AFFECTION? I'M NOT SURE. I'M STILL LEARNING ABOUT EMOTIONS.

SPEAKING OF EMOTIONS, DIPPER AND MABEL HELPED ME IDENTIFY A PARTICULARLY STRANGE ONE.

I DESCRIBED HOW I FELT ABOUT DIPPER WITHOUT BEING SPECIFIC ABOUT WHO I WAS TALKING ABOUT. MABEL TOLD ME I WAS FEELING LOVE.

I GUESS IT WOULD MAKE SENSE IF I HAD A CRUSH ON DIPPER.

MABEL AND DIPPER PRACTICALLY DEMANDED TO KNOW WHO I WAS TALKING ABOUT. BECAUSE OF POSSIBLE EMBARRASSMENT, I LIED AND SAID I HAD A CRUSH ON MARCUS BROWN.

I MEAN, SURE, HE'S NICE, HE'S TOLD ME I NEEDED TO APOLOGIZE, HE'S NOT BAD LOOKING, BUT HE'S NOT DIPPER.

COINCIDENTALLY, MARCUS AND DIPPER DATED.

I'M CONCERNED THAT DIPPER MIGHT HAVE BEEN LYING WHEN HE SAID HE WAS OVER MARCUS. MABEL SAID THEY WERE IN LOVE.

AT LEAST I KNOW THAT DIPPER'S MY FRIEND. HE JUST TOLD ME.

AND IF THAT'S ALL WE'LL BE, IT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long since I've updated I'll do better next time


	10. Dipper's Crush

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the long wait! I've been so busy. I haven't had the time to sit down and write. I hope you think this chapter was worth the wait!
> 
> Also, I haven't mentioned this before, but thank you for all the nice comments! They help me feel modivated to write and were a big part of why this chapter came out now instead of in a few weeks.

It took Dipper a month to trust his leg enough to walk without crutches, even though he would have been fine after three weeks. The move from the large brace that immobilized his leg to a small brace that allowed his knee to bend took another week.

Two and a half months after the incident, Dipper went the entire day without wearing any brace. Of course, he had the small brace in his backpack, should something happen. Nothing ever did though, and Dipper could walk without pain again.

Dipper's knee wasn't the only thing that changed in those two and a half months.

Mabel started to sit with her friends during lunch again after a couple weeks. Dipper was completely fine with it. He knew that Mabel couldn't abandon her friends, and he wouldn't stop her from having fun with them. After all, he had friends of his own.

Well, he had one friend.

Bill walked with Dipper and carried his books every single day without fail. At one point, around the four week mark, he had invited Marcus to his and Dipper's lunch table.

It was during this time that Dipper remembered why he and Marcus had become friends in the first place: their love for code breaking. Granted, they weren't quite as obsessed as they had been as freshmen, but they still liked to try to solve the codes Bill would make up and nervously present to them every day.

By the way Bill acted around Marcus, Dipper concluded that he was making up the codes to impress Marcus. And he wasn't very fond of that.

For some reason, he didn't like the idea of Bill and Marcus being together. It wasn't because they wouldn't be a good couple. Mabel often pointed out how compatible they were, and she was right.

But there was something about seeing them together that made Dipper uneasy.

It took Dipper a month to figure out what made him feel that way. Once he realized that it was jealousy that made him feel that way, he thought to himself I should have realized it sooner!

He thought his crush on Marcus had returned. For days, Dipper thought he felt butterflies whenever Marcus spoke. But that wasn't the case.

After those few days, Dipper realized that it wasn't Marcus making him feel that way. He just expected to have a crush on Marcus so he acted like it.

It was Halloween when Dipper finally figured out that he actually had a crush on Bill. Not knowing what else to do, he talked to Bill less than he normally did to avoid embarrassing himself or putting his crush on Mabel's radar.

One day after school, Mabel confronted him about hurting Bill's feelings. "He might be new at this, but he's not an idiot," she said. "Bill told me you're talking to him less. He thinks you hate him."

Dipper assured her that he wasn't trying to hurt Bill's feelings, and that he just had a lot on his mind. Mabel made him promise that he would apologize to Bill as soon as possible.

The next day in science, Bill didn't say anything. He didn't look directly at Dipper either. After an awkward lab filled with one word conversations and none of the usual banter, Dipper said "I know it seems like I'm ignoring you."

"I know you've been ignoring me," Bill grumbled as he put the equipment away. "There's no 'seems like' about it."

Dipper wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. He said "um, sorry. I just, I kind of had a lot on my mind."

"More like someone on your mind," Bill mumbled.

"What was that?" Dipper asked accusingly.

"Nothing." Bill said. He put his papers in his backpack.

"No, I want to know what you meant by that." A voice in the back of Dipper's mins warned that he shouldn't have been getting angry, but he couldn't hold that anger in.

"The only person you talk to and look at anymore is Marcus! You're giving him attention and ignoring your other friends, aka me. I don't know why you think you can just kick me aside when I'm learning how to be a normal human from you!"

Dipper wished it wasn't the tears on Bill's face that made him realize that he had gone too far. I shouldn't have been so stupid, he thought. Maybe I can still apologize…

The bell rang. "Bill, I-" Dipper started.

"Why don't you go hang out with Marcus," Bill spat as he grabbed his backpack and ran out of the room.

Dipper put on his own backpack and made his way toward his next class. He tried to ignore the loneliness that came from walking to class alone.

Later, Dipper walked to his old spot in the library, deciding that eating lunch with Bill and Marcus would only stir up more trouble. As he walked behind the bookcase, lunch in hand, he was surprised to find that Bill was already eating lunch there.

"This is my spot." Dipper said.

"I'm not moving." Bill replied, crossing his arms and refusing to look at Dipper.

"Well, I'm not either," Dipper said, sitting across from Bill. He pulled out his lunch and started eating, refusing to acknowledge Bill's existence.

After about twenty minutes, the tension in the air diffused and Dipper felt guilty again. "Look Bill, I'm sorry for how I've been acting."

Bill looked down with furrowed eyebrows and ignored him.

"I know you're listening." Dipper said. "I didn't mean-"

He was interrupted by the bell. The two boys stood up and left the spot behind the bookshelf.

"Bill, wait," Dipper called. He knew it would be his last chance to talk to Bill before their friendship completely fell apart.

Bill looked over his shoulder, glaring. "I'm going to be late for class," he said.

"Bill, please," Dipper begged, "I know I hurt you. But I swear I didn't mean to."

"Then what did you mean to do?" Bill snarled, turning. "How could you possibly think that flat out ignoring me wouldn't hurt my feelings? What, do you think I don't have any?"

Dipper knew he couldn't explain everything in such a short amount of time. "Can we talk about this later?" He asked, head lowered, hoping that Bill would be willing to hear him out.

Bill sighed and glanced at the clock in the library, then back at Dipper. "Okay," he said. "Tell me when and where we're talking right after school." Bill then bolted out of the library.

Dipper followed suit and ran to his own classroom, thanking his lucky stars that he wasn't slowed down by his crutches anymore.

\---

Dipper and Bill sat across from each other on Dipper's bed. It wasn't uncommon for the two of them to sit like that. Whenever they needed to talk, whether it was telling each other stories to get the other to laugh or a serious discussion about typical human emotions and behavior, they would sit on Dipper's bed.

The problem is that there wasn't any talking happening. Neither one of them knew how to start the conversation, nor did they want to. They sat in silence, avoiding eye contact, each waiting for the other to speak first.

In the end, it was Bill who broke the silence.

"So, where's Mabel?" Bill asked. "I thought she would have had come in here by now."

"Sleepover," Dipper answered. Bill nodded in understanding. Mabel was almost always having friends over or at a friend's house.

"Look Bill," Dipper started, not wanting the silence to return, "I really didn't mean to hurt you."

"Why did you ignore me, then?" Bill asked as he looked down, a pained expression on his face.

Dipper thought carefully about what he was going to say. "I…look I really have no excuse other than I've been thinking a lot about some things." He said. "My mind's been occupied."

Bill shook his head. "I just don't understand," he said, "I don't get why your mind's so occupied now that you can't talk to me, but when you had an injury that I know hurt you so much that it filled your thoughts for weeks, you would still talk to me, and answer my questions, and-" Bill took a shaky breath, "-and you would be there for me, whenever I needed to talk. I just don't understand, but…I'm trying, I'm trying my hardest to think and learn about what this means and I keep coming back to the same conclusion…"

Bill looked up, eyes darting around the room, his cheeks wet with tears. "I…I've concluded that you still have feelings for Marcus, and you think I'm going to get in the way of you and him getting back together, and you don't like that, so you're mad at me, but I swear I would never try to prevent you from being with him because I know it would make you happy."

Dipper shook his head as he said "Bill, no, listen…I don't have feelings for Marcus." Bill looked down and shook his head out of confusion. _Of course he's confused. He should be, after I threw out the only way he made sense of the situation._

Dipper took a deep breath before he said "Marcus and I are friends, but that's all we'll ever be. We broke up for a reason, and I'm not looking to get back with him. He's not the one my thoughts are filled with all day. He's not the reason I get out of bed every morning." Dipper touched Bill's hand and their eyes met. "He's not you."

Bill looked up, shocked at what Dipper said. "You mean I…I'm the one you've been thinking about?"

Dipper bit his lip and nodded. "I'm sorry, I was an idiot," he said. "I didn't want Mabel to find out about my crush on you so I panicked. I talked and looked at you less to try to prevent her from noticing, but I hurt you. There's nothing I've ever done that I regret more than that."

"Y-you have a crush on me?" Bill asked. Dipper nodded, biting his lip again.

Bill laughed. His laugh started out small, but grew bigger. "This is ridiculous," He mumbled to himself. "I didn't think you'd ever feel what I felt for you."

Dipper's jaw dropped, then he smiled. Bill smiled back. The two boys sat there in silence Bill said "So, what now?"

"What do you mean?" Dipper asked.

"I mean," Bill said, "what do we do? We both like each other."

Dipper smiled. "Oh come on, you've seen enough romantic comedies to know what happens."

Bill shook his head. Dipper took a deep breath and said "If you want to, you'll become my boyfriend. And I'll be yours."

Bill smiled and looked at Dipper with a look of pure happiness and said "I'd like that. A lot."

\---

"So how long have you liked me?" Bill asked. It was hours later and the two boys were watching their favorite show together.

Dipper shrugged. "A few days. How about you? How long have you liked me?"

Bill thought for a moment. "Remember that first sleepover when I described a feeling and you said it was love?" He asked.

Dipper laughed. "Don't tell me-"

"I was describing how I felt about you," Bill said, smiling. Then he kissed Dipper on the cheek.

"You dork," Dipper said, blushing and laughing lightly. He wrapped his arms around Bill, who in return did the same. They laid there, holding each other, for the rest of the night.


	11. Bill's Boyfriend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow I'm so sorry it took so long for this to get updated! I've been really busy and didn't really have time for writing, but I finally managed to make this!
> 
> (By the way, I wrote a short billdip fic a while ago called The Last Serenade so if you want more billdip fluff go read it!)

Dipper woke up with Bill's head on his chest and he immediately smiled, remembering the previous night. He lied there in disbelief for minutes before looking at the clock, which read 10:34 pm.

Dipper ruffled Bill's hair, saying "hey, Bill, get up." Bill groaned and lifted his head, staring at Dipper before tapping his nose as of it were a snooze bar and lowered his head, saying "just five more minutes."

Dipper giggled and said "sorry, but we have to get up."

"Why?" Bill asked, wrapping his arms tighter around Dipper.

"Breakfast," Dipper said, knowing that it was the one thing that would get Bill out of bed.

When they got downstairs, Bill started making pancakes.

Months ago, they discovered that Bill was actually really good at cooking and that he really enjoyed it. Mabel, being busy with one of her clubs, needed someone to bake cookies for another club. Dipper was fast asleep at the time, so rather than wake him, Bill found a recipe and followed it perfectly.

Ever since then he cooked whatever he could for Dipper and Mabel, including breakfast when he stayed the night.

By this time, Bill had the recipe completely memorized. Dipper watched as Bill cracked eggs, measured ingredients and mixed.

When Bill was about to put pancakes on the pan he said "Hey, why don't you go sit down at the table?"

Dipper did what Bill suggested and waited. Finally, after a few minutes, Bill gave Dipper a stack of heart-shaped pancakes.

Dipper smiled and looked up at Bill, who was blushing. "This is really cheesy," Dipper said. "I love it."

Bill leaned on the table and said "only the best for my best customer."

"Oh, so I'm your customer?" Dipper asked, standing up. "I guess I should give you a tip, then." Dipper kissed Bill's cheek, making both of them red.

They stood facing each other until Bill realized his pancakes were burning. He rushed back to the stove and Dipper sat down to eat his pancakes.

After Bill finished making the rest of the pancakes and sat down to eat, Mabel came home.

"Hey guys, have you two made up yet?" She asked, not giving them time to answer before running upstairs to drop her bag off.

"Are we going to tell her?" Dipper whispered.

"Only if you want to. Do you want to?" Bill asked.

"I will if you want to." Dipper said.

"Only if you agree." Bill said.

"So what happened last night?" Mabel asked, sitting down and grabbing some pancakes. "You two refused to talk and now you're having breakfast together."

Dipper and Bill looked at each other for a moment before Bill said "We talked."

"And?" Mabel prompted.

Dipper said "We made up."

Mabel stared at the boys as if she knew there was more.

The silence planted by Mabel was long and awkward. Dipper knew this trick. Mabel wouldn't say anything until someone broke the silence.

Dipper wouldn't fall for this. Then he looked over at Bill, who looked more uncomfortable the longer the silence was.

Finally, Bill couldn't take it any longer and blurted "I have a boyfriend!"

Mabel raised an eyebrow, again staying silent, wanting an explanation.

Dipper sighed and said "I'm his boyfriend. As of last night."

It took a second for the realization to set in, but when it did, Mabel smiled and said "I can't believe it took you guys this long!"

"What do you mean?" Dipper asked. Mabel gave him a smug look and Dipper said "What–how long have you been shipping us?"

"Since Bill lied about having a crush on Marcus."

"How did you know?" Bill asked.

Mabel said "I've seen you around Marcus. You don't act like you have a crush on him. It seemed more like you had a crush on Dipper."

Bill and Dipper looked at each other, then at Mabel, equally impressed and terrified at her people reading skills.

Mabel said "Noe get dressed, I'm going to teach you guys how to go on a date."

\---

It was late, and Dipper was alone. He should have seen it coming. Dipper should have been sleeping hours ago, but instead he was still wide awake, thinking.

Dipper saw it coming a mile away and he didn't do anything to stop it. He knew he couldn't be so happy earlier that day without consequences. It was a pattern he noticed a long time ago, and so far, it's only been proven right. Dipper couldn't be happy without being depressed soon after. It was the unfortunate truth, and nobody could convince him otherwise.

The more Dipper thought about his new relationship with Bill, the more outrageous it seemed. It started to get suspicious. Bill was a demon-he's been making deals since who knows how long. He knew how to turn everything in his favor. He couldn't have come out of the losing end of a deal with Ford.

Of course, there was always the option that Bill didn't lose. He could have been lying. He could be pretending to be weak.

Dipper's heart nearly stopped when he realized this. There was no way Bill would put up with Dipper if he was actually human. He wouldn't give up ruling those jocks-and his reputation-for a helpless, nerdy teenager. He'd never agree to date a helpless, nerdy teenager.

Not unless it was all part of his plan.

Dipper closed his eyes and tried to make the thoughts go away, but he couldn't. He wanted to believe that Bill really was a normal human now, that he loved Dipper, but it seemed too far fetched.

"Why would anyone love me anyway?" Dipper asked out loud to his empty room. He paused, hoping that everyone in the house was sleeping, that nobody heard what he said. There wasn't a sound. It was as if the house was completely empty. He felt lonely.

He sighed and stared out his window. It was raining.

Dipper focused on the calming sound of rain hitting his window to calm himself. A car passed by, lighting up part of the room, and he suddenly wished he was close enough to jump in front of it.

"I was so close…" Dipper mumbled as tears filled his eyes. He was almost calm. So close to being okay again. But this tipped him over the edge again.

Dipper shakily sat up on his bed. After a few minutes, he crossed the room to his desk and opened the bottom drawer, the one he hadn't touched in months. He took out the pieces of paper and read it over.

I, Dipper Pines, have chosen to end my life. I leave my research notebooks to my great uncles and the rest of my belongings to my sister to keep, distribute, or burn as she wishes.

Dipper took in a shaky breath and he added two more words to the bottom.

I'm sorry.

He left the note on his bed for someone to find in the morning. He put on his shoes and snuck out of the house.

Dipper didn't know where he was going. He didn't care. He left his jacket in his room and as a result, he was getting soaked as he walked down the empty street.

He didn't look at his neighborhood, or the trees, or the signs. He stared at the ground in front of him. He crossed roads without checking if there were cars coming. There weren't any, but Dipper wouldn't have cared if there were.

Dipper didn't know how long he walked for. All he knew was that he eventually made his way to an overpass.

He looked up for the first time since he'd been outside and stood still, questioning whether he should proceed or not.

Dipper took a step toward the overpass.

And another.

And another.

Soon he found himself in the middle, staring out across the freeway below him. His eyes burned from crying so much. He sighed and sat on the edge. This is the closest he's ever been to actually committing suicide, and it scared him a little. But not enough to let him stop.

Then he heard a voice calling his name. He shook his head, figuring it was a trick, his brain's last ditch effort to get him to stop. He slid closer to the edge.

Then he heard it louder. He recognized it. It was Bill's voice. He figured it was his brain trying to guilt him. He ignored it again, instead focusing on the traffic below.

He saw the cars driving by. Their headlights made the raindrops in front of them visible before eventually disappearing under him. He heard the splashes as cars drove over puddles, and he watched the water spray out from underneath the tires.

Dipper took a deep breath and closed his eyes as he slid off the overpass.

That breath would have been his last if someone hadn't grabbed him by his chest and pulled him back onto the overpass.

Dipper stared up at Bill, who looked terrified and was breathing hard.

"What were you doing?" Bill asked with a cracking voice, a steady stream of tears falling from his face.

As Dipper stared at Bill's face, full of concern and fear, the full weight of the situation hit Dipper. He began to sob.

The two boys held each other for a few moments before Bill said "Please don't scare me like that again" with so much love that Dipper was astounded that he ever thought Bill was pretending.

Dipper sniffed and said "I'm so sorry."

They held each other for a few minutes more before Bill said "Let's get you home so you can dry off." Dipper nodded and the two of them stood up. Bill held Dipper's hand tight the whole way home.

When they got to Dipper's house, Bill texted Mabel, who opened the door and immediately hugged Dipper.

The three of them walked upstairs to Dipper's room in silence. When they got there, Mabel gave him a towel and a change of clothes.

"Are you gonna be okay?" Mabel asked nervously. Dipper nodded slowly. "Do you want to talk about anything?" She added, but Dipper shook his head. Mabel looked at Bill with a worried expression and hesitated at the door before she left, saying "Okay. Love you Dip."

Bill helped Dipper change his clothes and covered him with a comforter.

"Hold me?" Dipper asked hopefully, and Bill did almost immediately. They lied on Dipper's bed for a while before Dipper asked "how did you find me?"

Bill didn't answer for a while and Dipper thought he might have gone to sleep. Eventually, Bill said "I had this feeling. Like something bad was going to happen. Except it was worse."

After a pause, wondering if he should explain everything, Bill said "My deal was to keep you safe in exchange for a physical form. This body counts. I was tricked, but I still had to keep you safe.

"Ford explained that you weren't doing well at the high school, and you might do something. It took me a few days to find out that he wasn't being paranoid and you needed a reason to live. You see, whenever a deal that includes demon is broken, or almost broken, both parties know. And right after I got here, I had a nightmare, but I didn't know how you almost died until Ford told me.

"I didn't get that feeling again until tonight. When I got it I texted Mabel to check on you. She called back and said you were gone and read the note.

"I don't know exactly how I knew where you were. Luck, magic, love, the deal…maybe all of those things. But I'm so glad I did."

A long silence followed. Dipper wanted to say so many things, but at the same time he didn't want to keep the two of them up all night talking since it was already so late.

"I love you," Dipper said softly.

Dipper felt Bill hold him tighter.

Dipper closed his eyes and fell asleep, but before he drifted off, he heard Bill say "I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what did you guys think of this chapter? You guys hate me yet? :)


	12. Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't abandon this fic just yet! I didn't realize how long it had been since the last update so I'm sorry and please enjoy!

Dipper woke up feeling the most comfortable he had ever been in his life. Pillows were all around him, a large, warm comforted was on top of him, and someone who he loved was holding him. He was surrounded by warmth, yet he didn't feel much better than he did the night before.

He knew this feeling would pass. Whenever he went to bed feeling depressed, he woke up feeling depressed, but he never stayed like that for long unless he gave himself time to overthink.

Knowing that laying in bed doing nothing was a perfect environment for overthinking, he sat up. Bill woke up.

"How're you feeling?" Bill asked in a soft voice. Dipper looked at Bill. Bill was tired and looked worried, as if he was afraid that what happened last night would happen again this morning.

Dipper shrugged in response to Bill's question. He said "I'm still kinda feeling bad about what happened last night, but I'm going to be fine as long as I'm distracted by something."

Bill nodded and said "Alright, let's get you distracted." He took Dipper's hand and they walked downstairs to find Mabel, already up and knitting furiously. When Mabel saw them, she got up and hugged Dipper.

"Are you going to be okay?" Mabel asked in a rough voice. Dipper hoped she hadn't stayed up all night worrying.

Dipper looked Mabel in the eyes and, with confidence, said "Yeah, I will be."

The three of them talked for a long time as Bill made breakfast. Dipper told the two people he trusted most about his feelings. He told them he felt like he wasn't doing enough, that he should give up. That there was something inside him that amplified his imperfections. He told them things that he hand told anyone before, or admitted to himself. That he was scared and he needed help.

Mabel and Bill told him exactly what he needed to hear. That Dipper was important to them, and that they wouldn't be disappointed if he dropped a class or two to focus on his mental health. Mabel told him that his mental health was worth more than whatever credits he gained. She and Bill promised to help Dipper if he ever had suicidal thoughts, needed reassurance, or needed a break.

Later, they watched some of Dipper's favorite movies and went out to get ice cream. They all had a good time, and were able to relax. They finally went back home when the sun set.

They sat in the living room for hours, just enjoying each other's company and watching whatever was on tv. Dipper was in Bill's arms, and Mabel was knitting from across the couch.

Like that morning, Dipper was comfortable. Probably the most comfortable he had ever been.

But this time, he felt loved.

\---

That night, when Bill and Dipper were cuddling in bed, Dipper had a thought come to him.

"Hey Bill?"

"Hmm?"

"I forgot to tell you that Mabel and I are going to Gravity Falls for winter break this year."

"Oh." Bill's disappointment was obvious, though he tried to hide it.

"Hey Bill?"

"Yes?"

"Do you want to go to Gravity Falls with us?"

Bill kissed Dipper's forehead and said "You already know my answer."

Dipper smiled like he'd been smiling all day.

"Hey Bill?"

"Yeah?"

"I love you."

Dipper could hear the smile in Bill's voice when he said "I love you too."

\---

A week before they would leave for Gravity Falls, when Bill and Dipper were on a date in the park, Bill said to Dipper, "I thought it would be winter by now."

Amused, Dipper responded, "it sort of is."

Bill tilted his head and had a confused look on his face. "Then where's all the snow, ice, and snowmen?" He asked.

Dipper laughed softly and said "it doesn't get cold enough for that kind of stuff down here."

Bill frowned and looked away. Dipper asked "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing." Bill replied, revealing that something was indeed wrong.

Dipper took Bill's hand in his and said "Come on, I know you better than that."

Bill looked up at Dipper and said "I just wanted to build a snowman with you."

Dipper smiled and hugged Bill so he couldn't get away. "What?" Bill asked.

Dipper said "You're too cute. We'll get to build that snowman, don't you worry. It snows in Oregon."

Bill turned beet red. "Oh. Sorry, I forgot."

Dipper said "Don't worry about it. To err is human and all that." Dipper smiled at Bill, who returned the smile.

As they walked, they talked about snow and winter. Bill asked all sorts of questions and Dipper answered. They daydreamed together of the fun they would have in Oregon.

Although Dipper would normally prefer to sit inside and read with a cup of hot cocoa during his winter trips up north, he was genuinely excited to show Bill snow angels and snowball fights.

Dipper was excited to see the wonder on Bill's face and knew that he would fall in love with him even more than he had already.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, so sorry about the lack of updates. But from this chapter on, I should be able to write more frequently.
> 
> Oh, and before I forget, sorry I never brought this up, but thank you for all the kudos and comments! I never imagined I'd have this many of either. Reading your comments really motivates me to write and i just want to say thanks!


End file.
